Eighteen

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Officer Li looks dubiously at the golden brown burrito in the plastic basket that Beatriz, one of the owners of The Shack, sets on the counter in front of him. The thing’s already soaked the tissue paper lining with grease.

“And you have to eat it with French fries,” I say.

“I do?”

“Nah. We just always bought something else to say thank you. Can I have a root beer?” I ask Beatriz. “Large?”

“Same for me,” says the cop.

She gets out the paper cups, fills them at the fountain, and presses the flimsy plastic lids in place. The Shack’s service window opens right onto the kitchen. You can see everyone moving around inside, preparing the food.

Officer Li waves me off when I get out my wallet and pays for everything, plus a couple dollars’ tip that he tucks into the marked jar on the counter.

Yeah, the layers of weird on this situation keep piling up. He paid for the burritos at Jacksons too.

“You all right?” he asks as we head on over to an empty table.

“I’m eating deep fried burritos with Officer Li. I might as well be having another psychotic break.”

He laughs as we tuck into our burritos. “Okay,” he says after a few chews. “This is so disgusting and amazing.”

It’s the truth. The deep fryer turns the tortilla into a crispy crust, while the interior is all melted cheese and warm shredded beef. I’m not sure how many of these a person’s arteries can take in a lifetime, but I’m probably well past the number.

“Oh, hey,” snaps an irate voice that I’d know anywhere. Kailie comes storming across the gravel parking lot to us. “What the... This is my invention, okay? You can’t go giving secrets like this away to The Man.” She stops at our table and stands, one hip jutting out, her lips in a pout of disapproval.

“You want one?” I ask.

“Yes. But I’m not getting one.” Uninvited, she pulls out a chair and joins us. “Since when were you consorting with the Dark Side, Alex?”

“These were not your invention.” I point at my burrito.

“Yes they were.” That comes out as a shriek of indignation. “Like you would even know. I was the one who flirted with Hernan and got him to make these after midnight, and then Carson Montrose flirted with Beatriz and got her to make them before midnight.”

“I’m thinking he probably just asked her,” says Officer Li. “She doesn’t seem like the type to be moved by flirting.”

“Shut up,” Kailie snaps at him. “Was I talking to you? No, I wasn’t. Why are you here, Alex? I thought you were going to the movies.”

“What, does she have a tracker on you?” Officer Li asks.

“Yes.” She doesn’t even glance his direction this time. “Now shut up. Alex? What’s the deal?”

“I wasn’t feeling well, and then I punched John.”

“Awesome! You rock. Did you knock him out?”

“Out cold,” says Officer Li.

“What?” I say. “No, I-”

The two of them share a conspiratorial laugh. “Okay, that is funny,” says Kailie, “but I still wasn’t talking to you.” She turns her back on Officer Li once more. “What did John do?”

“Just…”

“I totally hear that. Good job. Someone had to do it. So why are you here? I mean, is this your last meal before Mr. Officer Boss Guy locks you up?”

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