365 // irwin

Chapter Seven

DAY THREE HUNDRED AND SIXTY FIVE

"I only got one fucking year!" he yelled kicking his couch with his leg, before falling into it, his arms over his head as he continued to scream, angered.

I flinched seeing him like this as I sat on the opposite couch, I wasn't quite sure if I was supposed to see him like this or not but nevertheless he was breaking down in front of me and I didn't know what to do to stop it. I didn't know what I could do to help him. His face emerged from the couch only to punch the pillow in front of him. And he punched it again and again and again before throwing it to the ground, more screaming followed.

"Ashton," I began cautiously, standing up from my spot and slowly walking over to him. It seemed to work, me being close to him that is. His body stilled, became rigid as he gripped onto the pillow, his knuckles turning white.

But his breathing didn't steady, it remained quick and hard, almost as if he were a bull just waiting to strike. I think he knew as well, that he was about to explode, because when I reached my arm out to wrap round him he jerked away, words not able to explain what he was feeling.

"Once upon a time you said that we got fucking forever," he swore, punching the pillow again before standing up and throwing it to the ground, dropping to the ground, "Do you know what that is? It's not three hundred and sixty five days! Emilia! What the fuck!"

"I can't miss this, Ash" I offered back and judging by the look on his face, he knew that I was right.

DAY SEVEN

I could sometimes still hear the sirens. Everyone knew what those sirens meant, it didn't take a genius. You knew from a young age as well when your Mum would have to go through the awful task of explaining to you what an ambulance actually was. My Mum told me that they were saving people, saving people from trouble.

I underestimated how big that trouble could be. I thought it was very dangerous for the drivers of these ambulances, driving so quickly and that. Quickly navigating their way through cars and traffic. "That's very dangerous," I often said, shaking my head, "They could die. What sort of trouble would be worth that?" But now I understand. Now I understand why they have to drive so damn quickly.

You never fully understand the value of a second, of any amount of time until a small sliver of time dictates something large, like a life. Because it's true, a second can dictate whether someone lives or dies. Perhaps if the police were a tad bit quicker, or that man at the counter were a tad bit quicker, if the ambulance was a tad bit quicker, anything could have changed the outcome, saved a life, saved his life.

Perhaps the boy who had become a had would be a has.

But he wasn't. He was a had. And what was I? Well, I could still hear the sirens.

"You do this thing where you zone out, you know?"

I blinked a couple times too quickly as my focus shifted back onto Ashton who was sat there with a beanie on his head, band t-shirt clinging to his torso, toothpick in between his teeth.

It was quite literally a disappointment when I could only muster up a pathetic, "Hm?" which caused him to laugh, taking his toothpick out from in between his teeth, instead in between his fingers.

"Your mind goes somewhere else, I don't quite know where. I don't quite know where yet but I'll figure out one of these days. Until such time I'm just going to enjoy it," he nodded his head, kicking at the grass a little before leaning over to me, his hand cupping my cheek and his thumb lightly tracing my bottom lip, "There are secrets in here," he began his thumb continuing to move along my lips, "I want them out."

We were sat on a hill a little out of town, sat on the grass with a bottle of red wine that we both kept forgetting to touch as we continued to share banter back and forth. We'd spent far too much time together over the past week. Sometimes people looked at things, just like that, just like a week. But I think by doing that you make something seem less than what it is.

It would sound so much better if you said seven days. That sounds better, doesn't it? Usually two people spending time together - which is what I classified us as at the moment - a week may mean one date. For us it meant four, if you included the walk. Not that I was keeping track. But generally when there is an attractive male paying attention to you, you do keep track.

"I think that's how I'm going to keep you around," I teased, popping a jellybean into my mouth with a grin.

"That's how you're going to keep me 'round?" He repeated, poking me in the side causing me to throw a jelly bean his way, one that he caught in his mouth, grinning far too wide as he grabbed another one, throwing it in the air and catching it in his mouth.

"I'm going to be mysterious," I continued, making my voice go low which only caused him to wrap his arms around me, laughter falling from his lips, as he hugged me to his chest, kissing the top of my head, "Ashton Irwin, are you mocking me?"

"Never," he said in attempts to defend himself as he used his arms to drag me into his lap, resting his chin on top of my head happily, "That wouldn't be a very good idea for someone trying to woo a pretty lady now, would it?"

"You're trying to woo me now are you?" I added in, raising my eyebrows even though he might not be able to see my face.

"You?" he began, "I thought I said a pretty lady? It's not you, I've got a couple of ladies on the side you see."

"Do you really now?"

He nodded his head, I could already imagine the smug look that would be proudly displayed on his face, "I have at least twelve girls on the side. There's Cindy, Darla, Shirley--.. Oi! Stop that! Stop hitting me! You have little girly hits! Ouch--...! Fuck! That wasn't girly!"

I grinned in triumph as he surrendered, raising his arms in the air. But when I kept hitting him he took it upon him self to wrap his arms around me, pulling us both into a standing position then slipping his arms underneath my legs and carrying me bridal style.

I crossed my arms across my chest, shaking my head, "Let me go, Ashton," I huffed, I was attempting to seem somewhat grumpy but it honestly wasn't working in my favour as he swung us around causing me to squeal and wrap my arms round his neck in fear of me falling over.

"You don't seem like you want me to put you down," he smugly grinned continuing to spin us around only earning judging looks from me though my lips continued to tug up, "I'm going to carry you forever."

"You're going to carry me forever?" I repeated, dragging my tongue across my lips and wetting them before laughing lightly.

"If you give me that long I will," he offered back, biting down on his lip, stopping spinning, his eyes looking into mine, "Will you give me a forever to hold onto you for?"

"Won't the twelve girls get a bit jealous?"

"I'm willing to take that risk," he quickly answered back. He was always so quick with his answers and always kept me on my toes, the same smile on his face as his eyes flickered around mine, almost searching.

"Yes."

"I want you to say it."

"Yes, Ashton Irwin. I'll give you forever."

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A/N: So basically I thought it may be fun to start doing time jumps in chapters. Just at the beginning like that though, I swear I won't be bouncing back and forth like a bloody bunny rabbit that had a bit too much sugar. It'll just be between Day 365 and the day that I'm writing out, hopefully. Don't hold me to that.

Lol short chapter but until the days progress I can't do too much for realism sake but I swear I'll write longer ones ily