The Hot List

Pickup Lines (Ch 4)

Math. Wow, did I hate this class. It was like death or something, for a couple reasons. For one, I had no idea what was happening at any point in time. The teacher, Mr. Fillmore, would lecture us on Trigonometry for the 45 minute period and I would understand nothing in all that time. So that was a definite negative. Another reason this class sucked ass: Madison and Brett were both in this class, and they were usually all over each other, all the time. Nobody wants to see that. Well, except for all their minions, who stared at them like they were watching p*rn or something, but with the p*rn stars wearing clothes. Idiots. The third reason I hated Trig with a passion was that I had no friends in this class. Zero.  I sat down at a random desk, and started to zone out. Unfortunately, I didn’t get to even go to my quiet place before somebody poked my back with a pencil. I whipped around to find my face about two inches away from the face of the kid who had hit on me in the hallway.

“Hi, I never got to introduce myself. I’m Josh,” he said, smiling brightly. And still not moving his face away, I might add. Though it wasn’t exactly an ugly face that he had.  I pushed that out of my head. He was an annoying jerk, I told myself.

“Oh, hi Josh. Is there a reason you’re in my space bubble?” I asked him politely.

“Hmmm.” He looked down and then up at me again, his hazel eyes piercing through mine. Wow, I really needed to stop examining his appearance. He wasn’t that cute…oh. Now I just admitted to myself he was cute. Damn.

“Nope!” he declared, leaning back in his seat again. Great, now I felt like an idiot for having my face stuck out so far. I turned back around in my chair to face Mr. Fillmore and his boring lecture. Somebody whacked my back with a pencil. Yeah, you guessed it, it was Joshy boy. Wow, was he irritating.

“Are you this annoying all the time, or are you doing that especially for me?” I asked him.

He shrugged noncommittally.

“Look, Brett and Madison aren’t having their usual lovefest today,” he commented, nodding towards the usually together couple. They weren’t even sitting together today. Odd.

“Maybe it’s foreplay,” I commented drily.

He chuckled.

“Well, it gives all of our eyes a break for once. Mr. Fillmore is honestly practically blind, I can’t believe he doesn’t notice.” he grumbled.

“Right?! Like, we don’t need to see you getting your f*ck on,” I exclaimed.

Right as I said that, the class got really quiet. Wow, classic. I grimaced, blushing, and turned back to face Mr. Fillmore, who miraculously hadn’t noticed anything. The rest of the class had heard me though, and a snicker rippled throughout the room. Out of everyone though, Josh was laughing the hardest; I could hear him cracking up behind me. I turned around to face him again, checking on Mr. Fillmore to make sure he was still oblivious.

“It wasn’t that funny,” I grumbled. Josh’s hazel eyes danced with held back laughter.

“It was, a little bit,” he told me.

“Since I’m so funny and all, are you going to stop hitting on me?” I asked him hopefully.

“Hmm…I’m not sure I can do that, with you being so damn gorgeous and all,” he said matter-of-factly. I rolled my eyes.

“So, have you got any good pick up lines then?” I asked. I found pick up lines pretty funny, to be honest. They were cheesy, but good for a laugh.

“If I give you a good enough pick up line, will you go out with me sometime?” he asked, grinning. I raised an eyebrow.

“Only if you come up with a good one, that I haven’t heard.” I said confidently. I’d heard pretty much all of the good pickup lines out there, so I was sure he wasn’t going to win himself a date.

“If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together,” he told me.

“Really? If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put F and U together,” I told him cuttingly.

“Owch,” he said, wincing.

“You’re going to have to do better than that,” I announced.

“Do you believe in love at first sight, or do I have to walk by again?”

“Yeah, but this time don’t stop walking,” I replied, cracking a smile.

Josh sighed. It was obvious he could tell he was going to have to work harder if he wanted to win a date.

“You must be tired from running through my mind all day,” he said hopefully.

“Yep, I was running away from you,” I said.

He grimaced, then rallied.

“The word of the day is legs. Want to come to my house and spread the word?” he asked, grinning.

I stared at him. I actually hadn’t heard that one. Then I smiled wryly.

“Okay, you’ve got yourself a date this Saturday.”