if you leave | E.D

7.

i wake up to the flurry of activity in the hallways outside my hospital room door.

my eyes finally adjust and i see my mom and sister just entering the room.

"layla, thank god you're alive." my mom came over and hugged me gently.

"we were worried sick" angel grabbed my hand.

"i'm okay" i lightly chuckled, causing a slight headache. my eyebrows flinched from the sudden pain.

they noticed and both gave me a sympathetic look. mom smoothly rubbed her thumb along my cheek.

"do you want anything for breakfast? we can bring you something" my mom offered, but i shook my head, not really having the appetite. they nodded and sat down in the chairs beside my hospital bed, waiting for the doctors to come in with any updates.

part of me kinda misses ethan right now.

then i remember something.

he gave me a note last night.

aw, i wanna read it.

the thought of him makes me smile slightly.

"hey mom, do you know where my clothes are?"

"yes i have them, but you can't change our of your hospital gown yet" her head tilted.

"oh, i know, i just have something in my jeans' pocket" i told her as she nodded and reached for my pants. once she handed them to me i rummaged through the pockets till i found the little crumbled up piece of paper.

i carefully unfolded it. the paper was now soft from being packed so tightly.

i can't shake the feeling that something is wrong..

once i completely unfolded the piece of torn paper i started reading it.

my heart stopped.

"if you leave me, i won't survive"

everything zapped back to reality and i jumped out of my hospital bed without thinking, causing severe pain in my leg but i didn't really care. angel and my mom yelled at me but i pushed past them. i hopped out of the room and saw doctors flooding down the hallway. i wobbled down the hallway as fast as i could and stumbled into ethan's room.

i heard so many voices calling after me, and soon felt hands all over me trying to pull me back but it's like i was numb to all of it.

i grabbed ethan's hand and his eyes slowly fluttered open.

"..layla?" he could hardly push out enough air to speak.

"ethan. i'm right here. stay with me" i cupped his face in my hands.

"but i thought-" he started coughing.

"don't talk. just listen. stay awake. i know how tired you feel and how bad you wanna close your eyes. but can you please stay awake for me? please" a tear dropped from my eyelashes that i didn't know was building up.

he nodded. his eyebrows narrowed.

his eyes started to slowly get heavier.

"ethan. ethan come on, you can do it. i- i need you in my life. i'm not sure in what way, all i know is that i can't lose you. not like this" i felt my whole body ache. not from my broken leg. not from my broken arm. just from emotion.

his eyes fully shut. seconds after, the line on the heart monitor went flat. and the sound of a flat, long, piercing ring filled my ears. my whole body fell. doctors tried pulling me back.

but my grip never loosened on ethan's lifeless, cold body.

this is truly, all my fault.