Shut up (SMOSH fanfic)

Chapter 4.

"uhh I'm pretty sure you are..." my mind went really sexual there.

I was laying on my bed, and my mind went into this crazy insane imagine-if land.

I bit my lip, and he waved at me. I even forgot that I was mad at him. "what happened?" he looked at me.

"uh nothing?" 

"don't tell me it was nothing, you gripped the sheets so hard I thought you're going to break your own hands." he laughed.

"I need to get my shit together" I stood up and went to my wardrobe.

"really? Wardrobe?"

I was laughing at my friends back then, who were saying that my brother and his friend are panty-dropping hot.

Now (well not actually now, but still) that I've realized that I am into guys too, this wasn't too funny.

He knocked on my wardrobe door.

I laughed.

"seriously? knocking on the wardrobe door?"

"can I come in?"

"no."

"well then, I'm coming in." he said, and opened the wardrobe door, looked at me and sat down. "so explain this to me. Why is it good sitting here in the dark?"

"I do what I want."

"well then..." he said.

"I miss Lexi" I changed the subject.

"I'm sorry, but I can not delete that image, I just can't" he said. I started to laugh.

He put his arm around me, and pulled me in for a hug. But something poked me, which was not his elbow. At least I thought it was not.

I couldn't hold my laughter back.

"DUDE" I squealed and laughed at the same time. "I don't think we should be in the same room" I said. "something poked me and I don't think it was your elbow." I was laughing hysterically.

"okay let's forget that this ever happened."

"oh wait I forgot I am supposed to be mad at you so get out"

"no I won't"

"I'm leaving then." I kicked the door open, looked at Anthony and tried to hold my laughter back. "and I want to sleep now, so please leave the room." I said seriously.

He actually got up and left.

And I really fell asleep.

I only woke up when I felt something tickling my ribs.

I slowly opened my eyes and I jumped, therefore...

"OH YOU IDIOT" I said. "is the house on fire?"

"no" he laughed. Anthony was kneeling above me. It creeped me out.

"then why did you wake me up?"

"just to fuck with you" he said and I started giggling. "HOLY FUCK NO NO NO, THAT SOUNDED WRONG"

"ON SO MANY LEVELS" I groaned. "this is awkward, would you be so kind to stop this?"

"you are not mad anymore?"

"hell yes I am. But I'm not an asshole though..."

"so you're not mad" 

"I am bored of your shit."

Ian came back a few hours later.

"well?" he came in.

"nope." I said.

"you don't even know what I was thinking about"

"yes I do"

I explained him that I am still mad, and then he nodded, and left the room.

Then I heard Anthony talk.

"she's still mad, and she will be, let's just leave this here okay? She will make it up if she wants to."

"no, I will make her make it up, no matter what."

I didn't care about it. I acted like nothing happened, but I was still mad at him.

I fell into my bed at 9, and wrote some stuff into my journal.

I am having feelings... I think I'm turning into straight. Everything is getting fucked up.

Nothing more, since I could never know when will someone read it.

I've fallen asleep at around half past 9.

I don't even know when, but it turned upside down.

Somehow I've gotten into the kitchen and I drank some water.

"are you better?" I heard Anthony's voice.

"yes, why do you ask?"

"just asking.. And how does it feels to be straight?"

"weird."

"you know, life is like a puzzle.. The pieces are meant to be together, one gets the hole, and the other gets the sticking out thingy." I laughed.

"I know, but I've never felt like this before. Those nights were not the nights of true love... Only just two chicks banging around, or trying to bang around. One used the another and it goes on like that... And why am I telling you all this?" I asked.

"because you trust me?"

"I think so. I trust you enough for giving you the permission to pin me up against the wall and fuck me so hard that I can't walk the next day, so we can call that trust" he smiled at me and came closer. Leaned in and kissed me. Starts to suck my neck as he slowly undresses me.

I moaned. 

He slowly got rid of my useless pair of pants too, and the next thing I notice we are doing, is banging each other.

I kept on moaning until I woke up, literally sweating my ass off and suffocating.

I started coughing, and I even thought I will die.

I got up and went to the kitchen for some water. A few minutes later I heard footsteps.

And then I felt a hand on my arm.

This was the time when I felt it is good to be alive no matter what is about to happen.

"What's up?" he asked with motioning his head. I went back to my room and came after me. "you okay?"

"yes"

"I heard noises" he was in this briefs.

"I was probably sleeptalking."

"yes you were, then you started moaning... So any explanation?"

"I told you I was dreaming." he laughed silently at me.

"and what was it about?" 

"I am definitely not gonna tell you, so you can go back to sleep"

"why?" he sat down on my bed.

"I have my own reasons."

"no, I am being serious."

"please go..."

"no. Tell me."

"it is only going to be worse if I tell you." I whispered. "for all of us."

"okay." he got up.

"goodnight."

I slipped into a dream again but this time, we were arguing about something and I woke up when I dreamed that my back slammed against the wall.

I woke up suffocating at 11 AM, and started coughing. AGAIN.

Ian opened the door.

"everything's okay?"

"yeah"

"we're shooting a video, wanna come outside?"

"nah"