Kiss me

Chapter 5

Ellis groans. We were laying on the couch nursing our hangovers. We both had made sure the day before that today would be chill, predicting the inevitable.

After our 21st birthdays, we got drunk whenever possible. Kinda stupid, but that was 21 for you.

Fly came over and licked my hand, asking for a walk. I stood up, only to sit back down, a wave of dizziness flooding over me.

"Dude, why do you have like, no food?"

Ellis had gotten up and began rummaging through my fridge.

"Haven't done my shopping for the week yet."

I was so bored. I attempted to get up again and tentatively put my shoes on.

"I'm taking fly for a piss."

"Don't die."

▪ ▪ ▪

Outside, the air was warm, there was a slight breeze that ruffled through my hair. I walk around the small patch of grass in front of my apartment building and let Fly do her stuff.

Closing my eyes, I take in the sunlight. There's a buzz in my pocket and I reach down.

From: Axel

My heart races. He texted back.

Axel: Sounds awesome! Been dying to hangout again, lol. Just us?

I couldn't breath. He had thought about me. He wanted to see me. I smiled. Fly barked, sensing my hapiness, her tail waging. I started to walk back to my apartment, picking up my pace. I had to tell Ellis.

▪ ▪ ▪

"I told you he was into you."

I was pacing throughout the living room, chewing on my nails.

"Will you come with me?"

"No way. See how he said "Just us?" He wants it to be just you and him. Then you can make out all you want."

I punch him in the shoulder. He laughs.

"What I can do, is make you hot."

It was true, Ellis could make a trash can look hot.

My stomach was filled with butterflies.

"You better reply to him."

I nodded, unlocking my phone.

To: Axel

Me: Yup, just us. Hang by the track again?

Axel: Sounds good, cya tmrw.

He replied instantly. I let out a squeal of excitement.

Thinking about tomorrow practically cured my hangover, Ellis however was.... struggling. I felt kinda bad.

My phone buzzed again. I felt a stab of excitement. Axel?

From: Leon

Leon: There's a spot available today. 3 to 5. Be there.

Shit. Leon knows I had a free day today. I can't say no, he'll just come over and get me himself. As I said, no slacking with Leon. Ballet + hangover = torture.

Me: Today isn't the best
Leon: Has someone died?
Me: No...
Leon: Then there is no excuse. 3 to 5.

I tried

"Shit."

"What?" Ellis looks to me, struggling to open his eyes.

"Leon needs me to come in today for a practice at 3."

I check the time. 2:34.

"Will you be OK here for 2 hours?"

"Yea, I got Fly. We're good."

He gives Fly a pat.

Normally if I had practice, I would send friends home, but Ellis had a complicated relationship with his roommate, Ben. Luckily Ben worked alot, so Ellis just went home when he wasn't there. I don't know why he didn't just move out.

I give a thumbs up and run to my room. It takes 10 minutes to get to the studio, but Leon expects me to be there 10 minutes early. I wiggle into my tight leggings and throw on a green t shirt, tucking it in. I carefully place the packer in my pants and grab my dance bag. Time check. 2:38. Just on time.

"Love you." I call out behind me as I shut the apartment door.

▪ ▪ ▪

"Straighten your legs, extend!"

Leon's voice echoes in the small room.

"Your arms look like wobbly noodles, use your muscles. If you have any."

He pokes me with his stick.

"Hey!" My legs begin to shake. Sweat is practically pouring down my back.

The music fades away and I hold my feet in fifth, arms down in brauba. I keep my muscles tight, remembering the last time I relaxed prematurely. I wasn't feeling like running around the building 100 times today.

Leon bows his head, signaling the end.

I relax, taking a sip of water.

"Just focus on your turn out. Make sure to feel the rotation all the way up, and for heavens sake, use your buttocks!"

"I'm sorry. Just tired."

"No excuses!"

He puts me back on barre.

I listen to the music as I go through the motions. I know this exercise by the back of my hand, so I let my mind wander. I think of tomorrow. What I'm going to wear. I haven't been this excited since I got my apartment.

Although my body is working, I feel relaxed. Practice helps me sort out my thoughts. I finish off the exercise, letting Leon's praise bring a smile to my lips.

▪ ▪ ▪

I lay in bed that night, thinking of Ellis. He had gone home a few hours earlier. I had asked him why he didn't just move out, I even offered to find a place where we could move in together. He only shook his head, saying I wouldn't understand.

It had maddened me, but now it only pained me. Knowing that Ellis didn't feel he could trust me with something. I wanted to protect him. I didn't know what Ben had done, but he had definitely done something. I swore to myself that I would find out, and I would help my bestfriend.

Fly kicked her legs beside me, deep in sleep. I hoped she was having a dream of chasing the balls I threw for her. I let my hands wander over her fur.

"You're the one good thing my parents did for me."

Before I came out, I had been seeing a counsellor. I wasn't happy for the majority of my childhood. She suggested my parents get me a therapy dog. It took months to convince them, but eventually we drove to the local Spca.

My parents suggested this small chihuahua, but it was ugly. No offense. Instead, I found the lonely border collie that now lay on my bed. Something in her eyes drew me in. She needed me just as much as I needed her.

I drifted off to sleep curled up into her stomach, her steady heartbeat filling my thoughts.