"I still don't understand why we're here." My mom made us move to new jersey from Wisconsin. We used to live here and then we moved again and again and again. Now we're just in the same place we started. I've never had time for a real friend and this time mom said she found a permanent job. She always says that. The truth was I wanted to stay in jersey because it felt like home.
She hesitated and I went to my bedroom. My mom always did what she thought was best for us, but I think staying in one place is the best decision she could've ever made. Leaving everyone and not really gaining trust in anyone, it gives me anxiety. I'm scared to go out with anyone. I'm scared to start new everywhere. Teaching is different everywhere and I've had to learn at least 24 different ways to do multiplication.
I started unpacking my clothes, they were the last thing I needed to take out. I grabbed some hangers and opened a couple drawers, after a while I was finally finished. I crashed down on my bed and picked up my phone.
INSTAGRAM* 1 UNREAD DM. I opened it
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I mean I guess he was cute. And I believe it was my actual tour guide for school tomorrow. I started thinking about my moving and I had completely forgot I filmed all of it. I quickly started editing until my mom called me down for dinner. She ordered pizza and it was delicious.
After dinner, I went back upstairs to go have a shower. I hopped in, washed my hair and everything else, got out and went to my room. I put on an Ariana grande sweetener sweatshirt and some shorts, I got into bed and started watching some family guy. I fell asleep mid episode.
The next morning I woke up and got dressed quickly and didn't do my makeup or else I was going to be late.
I started to walk into the building, I got to my locker and felt a tap on my shoulder. It was Jake.
"Hey, can I give you that tour now?"
I wasn't going to deny the fact that I needed it and he had to.
"sure, where are we going first." I questioned
"wherever I take you." he smirked. I trusted him because I needed to, he was leading me around the school.
He started the tour off normally, first the gymnasium, then the cafeteria. He took a couple looks at my schedule and led me to a few of the classrooms I would be in.
He started to take me upstairs until we had reached the top floor.
"Come on, we have to get up one more level!" He exclaimed
"This is the last level Jake, I don't think there is one more." I replied
He grabbed my wrist and showed me to the janitors closet as he pulled down a ladder.
"I don't think we're supposed to be up here" I said, worry in my voice.
"you can trust me, I promise." He smiled and I held out my hand as he pulled me up onto the ladder.
He had led me up to the school's roof. I was worried that we would get caught up here. I was scared that I would get suspended on my first day at a new school. I looked over at the sky, it was so basic. A blue sky, the blinding sun hurt my eyes. I felt an arm wrap around my shoulder and I quickly turned around to see Jake, he leaned in and kissed me. I guess he thinks this is romantic. I didn't kiss back and he pulled away, I was still wrapped in his arms. I didn't really like him, but he tried, I guess. He stared at me for a few seconds, not even apologizing. He kissed me again. I don't think he realized that I wasn't kissing back.
He pulled away again. This time he let go of my shoulders. He smiled, I returned the gesture and smiled back at him, awkwardly. I was hoping that he'd see that I wasn't feeling the same way about him. I pretended to be okay with it even though my heart wasn't fully into it.
My first day went by pretty fast. After school, Jake offered to drive me home and I accepted because I didn't want to be driven by my mom everywhere. Throughout the day I kept getting recognized from my YouTube channel. Jake had introduced me to a lot of his friends and telling them that we were together. It made me so uncomfortable, but I didn't want to hurt his feelings. He drove me home and I went straight upstairs to my room because I needed to film a video about this new drama everyone has been telling me about. I went online and did some research about it. Turns out this guy named Jack Dail was telling everyone that we dated when I was in Wisconsin, all of my fans started freaking out because I never told them, and now all of a sudden he was telling everyone that we had a relationship.
I don't think that I've ever really talked to Jack. He was a really big jerk, but now people were noticing his comment because it was about me. I needed to get my camera and set it up. I quickly placed my camera and put up my lights.
"Hey guys, it's Jordan. I was online earlier and I kept seeing tweets from all of you saying that somebody named Jack was tweeting about how we dated and then when he broke up with me, I moved to a different State. The truth is I never dated Jack because he just isn't my type, and we would only say 'Hello' or 'Hey' in the halls because we had a few of the same friends." I had paused because I heard my phone buzz, it was a text from Jake and it reminded me that we were apparently 'dating'. I knew I couldn't date somebody if they're the only person in the relationship.
Jake Hey, can I take you out tomorrow?
Jordan Sorry, Jake. Can we talk tomorrow? I don't really want to go out
Jake What's wrong?
Jordan I'll tell you tomorrow, I'm filming right now
Jake Okay, I guess we can talk tomorrow. Goodnight beautiful.
I quickly shut off my phone. I was so uncomfortable by this entire situation. Jake was forcing everything to his liking, not mine. If it were up to me, and right now it is. I wouldn't be 'dating' Jake. I needed to break up with him tomorrow, or else something I didn't want could escalate.
I continued on with my video. "sorry guys, just a text. Anyways, no Jack and I never dated, he wasn't a person I would've wanted to date. I keep moving because my mom is always getting job offers, and this time we're in jersey and my mom found a permanent job." I took a breath and continued. "That's honestly all that's happening here. I think I'm fine with staying here because it feels like home already and it's only been 2 days." I chuckled. "Well, That's all I wanted to say. Thanks for watching, see you next Friday when I film an actual video. BYE!" I shut off my camera and started putting my setup away until my next video.
I was so tired, I put on a large purpose tour sweatshirt and some short shorts and went down to grab a snack before heading to bed, I wasn't feeling like having dinner but I was still hungry. I quickly ate my food and went upstairs to go to sleep. I was confident to tell Jake that I didn't want to date him, that we could still be friends.
