Jersey High | Grayson Dolan

thirteen

Were the twins people I knew? Were they even telling me the truth? People seem to know them. Names I don't recognize. Is there something they're leaving out? I wasn't going to internet stalk them because I'm not like that.

I decided to let them tell me whatever it was when they wanted to.

I started to get ready for school. I headed for the shower and turned it on. The shower was always been my own place, why would I share it?

I got out and dried off. I figured I still had a couple of minutes. I sat down and went on my phone. I scrolled through Instagram. I looked at all the comments again. I didn't think much of them and started to get dressed. I put on a high waisted pair of jeans, a yellow t shirt and black timberlands.

I grabbed my phone and skateboard. I was hoping I would see Grayson. I can't seem to get my mind off of him. I'm willing to forgive Nash. Cameron is an unforgivable piece of shit. I'm a forgiving person but right now I can't even look at him without seeing the look on his face while he was with me, I can't stop hearing the words that came out of his mouth. Telling me how beautiful I was. Making me feel worth it. This is why I've never been in a relationship. I've had my first kiss before though. Spin the bottle game for my YouTube channel. I had to kiss a couple of guys that I knew but wasn't friends with in Wisconsin so it's not like I wasted my first kiss on Cameron. I'm wishing I could take any kissing back and then have it as a special moment for somebody I loved.

I guess I just don't know how to make the right choice.

I started making my way to school when I saw Cameron drive in front of me. All the words and actions. They meant nothing to him. The girl he was making out with was in the car with him. He looked happy. I guess I was the trouble. I walked into school feeling worse. All I had to keep me going that day was Grayson. He makes me feel some way. I can't say anything about those feelings though. I tell him everything and this was starting to kill me.

I knew I needed to tell somebody. I just didn't know who.

I got to my locker as Ethan approached me.

"Hey"

"Hey Ethan, I want to tell you something. I just don't know how you'll take it."

"What is it Jordan?"

"I-i think I have feelings" he giggled

"What?"

"Do you mean for someone?" He asked

"grayson" I whispered

"What?" He asked

"Grayson" I spoke a little louder. I looked down

"Jord-"

"I know. I should keep things the way they are or else I'll ruin everything. Things just started to get better." I pulled him in for a hug.

"Ethan. I can't tell him" I sniffled

"Its okay Jordan. Everything will be okay I promise."

"Hey guys what's going on? Jordan are you Okay?" Grayson came up to us

I quickly stopped hugging Ethan and looked over at Gray.

"Yea I'm fine Grayson, why?" I know he didn't believe me.

"Nothing. Nevermind" he smiled and started to walk away. I followed him.

"Grayson." I called. He turned back.

"Do you wanna hang out later?" He nodded and we proceeded to walk to our next class.

A little while after class was done, Grayson and I were waiting in line.

"Is there something you're not telling me Jordan?" He asked, still looking at the food that was being out onto a tray.

"Is there something you're not telling me gray?" I shot back

"What're you talking about?"

"Why do so many people know who you are?" My suspicions had gotten the best of me.

"I'll tell you after school, but right now you don't seem too happy. I need to know how you're feeling." I swallowed air

"I'll tell you later too I guess." I know that if I tell him I have feelings for him then he might not want to hang out with me. I could ruin whatever we had. Friendship. Any of it would be gone.

We sat down. Neither of us hesitated to start eating. We didn't really talk. I could feel us becoming more distant. I guess this might not be the worst day to say anything about it.

Ethan ended up sitting with a couple of other people. I decided not to pay attention to it and focus on eating. My wound was getting way better. It was barely hurting now. I finished my food before Grayson and left. I didn't say a word to him.

I went to a few of my classes for the day and met up with Grayson. Ethan was going out with his girlfriend. I know I can't keep secrets around Grayson.

As we were nearing my house Grayson finally spoke.

"I'm sorry." I turned to him. I got distracted and fell off my skateboard.

"Jordan are you Okay?" He rushed over

"I'm fine, what're you sorry about?" I started to rub my elbow.

"About not telling you why people know who we are, people make assumptions, that's also a reason that Jake was a little bit jealous." My eyebrows furrowed. Nobody talks to them at school, I also don't hear them talking about the twins.

"We make YouTube videos, along with some vines here and there." My eyes out up. They did the same things as me. I guess he might've thought I knew who he was. His face wasn't familiar because I had never seen a face like his and Ethans.

"So you're like me?"

"Yea, it's just that we thought you were only friends with us because you knew us. People do that to us all the time and it's been hard to trust everyone these days."

"Yea." I breathed out "I know that feeling of only being wanted for your things or what you have"

I turned to look up at him and by my surprise he took me in for a hug and I returned the favour. He felt so safe and warm. He made me feel like this was my real home. I want to be in this paradise forever. I know I have to tell him.

"Grayson, I have something to tell you also"