Numb; Yoonmin + Namjin

Chapter 2: Part 4

I've been reading other books and wanted to change my style, but not too much.

YOONGI POV

I didn't mean to scare the kid.

He just looked like he wanted to befriend me, and that's exactly what I don't want.

It's not that I don't want friends, I say it's because I'm anti-social- which is partly the reason. But it's because I'm scared of being thrown aside. I knew this kid had lots of friends. I could tell from his eyes. The way they brighten when he remembered my name, because he has so many names ro remember. The way stuttered cutely, to draw people in with his adorable self. One day he'll make another friend, and forget about one, that could be me. The cycle never ends. Gaining...losing...gaining....losing.

It's like the lotto, I can never win...but when I do, I try to win again...and end up losing. And in the end...I have nothing.

"Min Yoongi, if I have to send you to the principal to keep you focused, I will!" Yelled my bio teacher, Mr. Wang.

I rolled my eyes, but paid attention nonetheless.

I ended up skipped next period, and going to the nurse.

"Nurse Kang, may I stay here for awhile?" "Why?" She asked, not because she cared, but because it's her job.

"I think the milk I had this morning was spoiled, I don't feel well," I lied walking over to the "bed", which was basically medal (struggling to) hold up a thin mat.

She nodded while writing on her clipboard. The same clipboard that holds everything that people have been in here for. From stomach pain, taking their meds, or even server bleeding. We've had ambulances called a few times. Some for kids who were so high they didn't know their name, kids who passed out from starving themselves just to look perfect, people who were beaten up to the point they had broken bones and were missing teeth, people passing out from exhaustion, which mostly happens during exam season. Dehydration happened once. Someone once tried to kill themselves.

It was me.

I was tired of all this crap. Of people talking behind my back, thinking I didn't hear...or maybe they wanted me to hear. To let me know how much of a freak they thought I was. Warning newcomers to keep away from me. Watching for even the smallest mistake I made to call me out on it. Even teachers do it. Though they think of it as pointing out my mistakes to help me learn from them. When Lisa and Rose stole Jennie's pencil box and laughed at her, no one said a thing. But when I borrow a pencil and forget to give it back, I'm accused of stealing and get detention.

I know what you're thinking, what the actual fuck.

So I just wanted the pain to go away, and knew, I just knew, people would be happier without me. Even Namjoon. I know it's hard to put up with me. I know Namjoon wants to grow from our past and live a good life. But I'm holding him back. He just doesn't want to be happy while I'm still depressed. He wants us both to move on.

I'm just not ready.

NAMJOON POV

"Broken people break people."

And it's true.

This four word quote means hundreds of things, to thousands of people. But to me it means,

My pain, brings even more pain to others.

Who are the others?

I don't know yet, and maybe I'll never know. But if I ever find someone who cries when they hear my story, then I'll give them the tittle of 'others'.

But for now, no one but Yoongi understands me. But Yoongi's too caught up in drowning in his own pain and sorrow, he doesn't see me trying to save him....

But I'm drowning too.

I may not be as deep in the water as him, but I'm still there. I'm still trying to help him. I still care. Even if he doesn't.

•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•

The walk to the cafeteria was long and boring. It would have been less boring if Yoongi was here. But he wouldn't talk to me, he said more words to the kid he almost beat up yesterday than to me in a day. But he's your best friend. I know he is, but even if we are best friends, he doesn't take notice to me, and focuses on himself. That's just self pity. Even you-

Wait.

Why am I having a whole conversation with myself in my head? Ugh. I'm going crazy.

I got my lunch and decided I'd eat outside in the school garden.

Little did I know there was someone there too, someone I would soon want to be with 24/7.

JIN POV

You say I'm crazy
'Cause you don't think I know what you've done.
But when you call me baby, I know I'm not the only one.

I hummed to the song quietly while sitting under a tree in the school's garden with an apple in my hand. I stared at a dying sunflower. It hadn't been watered in weeks.

I'm not even sure why we have a garden, from what I know, there isn't even a gardening club.

The song ended and another began to play.

When I signed my deal, I felt pressure

Like when I vowed to save Namjoon.

Don't wanna see the numbers, I wanna see heaven

I just want him to get better.

You said, can you write this song for me?
I said, I'm sorry I won't do that happily.
When I go home
I tend to close the door
I never wanted more
So sing with me
Can't you see?
I don't have Money On My Mind
Money on my mind
I do it for, I do it for the love
I don't have money on my mind
Money on my mind
I do it for, I do it for the love

Oh how I can relate to this song, I thought as I munch on my apple.

I felt like a pair of eyes were on me, but I ignored it, thinking it was imagination. But after a few minutes, it got annoying. I looked up to find Namjoon staring at me, I blushed and look down.

"W-Why are you here?" I asked. "Why can't I be here?" He said. Good point. "I was here first," I countered, thinking that was a good enough statement. Namjoon scoffed and looked at me, "Wow. I didn't know that!" He exclaimed in sarcastic tone.

I was about to argue back when my phone buzzed.

"You have friends?" I glared at Namjoon. "I mean, real ones? Wow. Who would have thought Park Seokjin had actual friends.  People who didn't just want to be his friend because of his looks," I roll my eyes and check my phone.

I_got_jams

Hyung, did you hear about the fall dance?

JINNIE ♡

No, but idc either

I_got_jams

C'mon hyung, don't be salty

JINNIE♡

Ur really annoying, u no that?

I_got_jams

OMG, IS THAT A YES!?

WE CAN GET MATCHING SUITS, AND GET A LIMO, AND ASK PPL OUT ( and possibly get rejected)

THIS IS GONNA BE SO MUCH FUN!!

JINNIE♡

Haha, I bet it will :))

No it won't, what did I just get myself into!?

~~~~~

Have a good day, humans!!!

1000+ words