FALSETTOS - Andrew × Christian

Back to the theatre

(Warning this is a long chapter so get a drink and some snacks before you start :) )

Most nights Rannells would sit back stage listening to his boyfriend perform with another man, it upset him but he would be so much worse at home.

He had been forced by Borle to go to the doctors the day after Lapine made the decision to give him 3 weeks off. They ran blood tests which didn't comeback until the day before he was meant to go back to the theatre to perform.

Over the weeks the only time Andrew had really left the house was in the evening to go to the theatre, this meant that he had no chance to exercise. And this lead to Andrew putting alot of weight back on in the short amount of time; this was something his lover often teased him about by pinching his newly chubby cheeks and his hips that weren't so boney anymore.

He returned to the theatre but today it was to run through the show the day before his first show back and he couldn't have been more excited, everyone noticed how much healthier he looked and as anticipated most of them poked fun at his weight gain but they all knew how important it was for him to be healthier. They welcomed him back with flowers and chocolates because no one had really seen him in the last few weeks as he kept himself locked away in Borles dressing room.

"Welcome back doll, how are you feeling?" Betsy Wolfe asked as she held him in her arms. He stepped back and looked at her and there were tears in his eyes as he confessed "I feel the same." He said as he let out a nervous laugh as the tears fell. "But fatter obviously" he tried to lighten the situation.

"Are you sure you should be here andy, you could've just taken more time." by this point she looked concerned.

"They found nothing... everything came back negative... there's nothing wrong with me." He started doing that nervous laugh he always did as more tears rolled down his cheeks. He couldn't face Betsy anymore as she rubbed his arm. He stood up and walked off to his room; leaning against every single wall on the way.

"Christian." Betsy called him over "How's Andrew been lately?"

"I honestly don't know, he looks so much healthier and it seems like he should be feeling good and all the tests came back negative but he still isn't doing better. I can see him still struggling and it's exhausting because I'm doing everything i can. I was giving him medication for the pains and food to get him stronger-" he looked defeated. "You were? What happened?" Betsy replied.

"Yeah, i was, but all it seems to be doing is making him drowsy and numb so i've stopped forcing him to eat but now he's stopped eating anything really, he might have something with me if he knows I'm watching him but not much else. " He said as he sat down and put his head in his hands.

"I'm proud of you, you're trying your best to help him and he may not be able to thank you yet but when this is over he will be so grateful." Wolfe sat next to him with her hand rubbing his back.

"Chrissyyyy" Andrew shouted from his room. Christian ran in thinking it was an emergency, as he opened the door to find Andrew sat on the floor out of breath.

"Oh my god, Andrew what's wrong?!"

"Chrissy..." he said panting "my pants don't fit... they're too small" he said looking genuinely sad. Christian couldn't help but giggle "Oh dear, i thought this was an emergency."

"It is!" Rannells said in a panicked voice.

"Ok stand up, we'll fix this." As Borle helped his lover up from the ground Andrew groaned in discomfort and Christian could really see how much he had changed. "Awweeee babe you've got alot of pudge there" He giggled.

"Christian stop it. I don't think you get it!" He said pushing away from Borle and turning around.

"Get what?" Christian tried to rub his shoulder but Andrew flinched at his touch.

"I hate this so much, you know i feel like my body is against me and having you poke fun at me hurts after a while. Especially today; I'm anxious as it is without the whole cast pointing out my weight" He explained, tearing up then turning to face Borle again.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know. I thought that you'd be happy to look healthi-" Christian was cut off by an angry Andrew.

"Well I'm not because i feel the same. And at least when you could see my bones people would know that I was sick. I fucking hate this. I hate it i hate it i hate it i ha-" Andrew began stomping and crying and gripping his head; Christian didn't know how to stop him. He moved towards him but before he could touch him Rannells started wheezing and stopped what he was doing. Andrew fell forward into Borles arms, his whole body limp as Christian lowered him to the floor where he layed for at least 20 minutes just sobbing into his lovers chest.

A knock at the door startled the now calmer Andrew. "Who is it?"

"It's stephanie, are you guys ok? Can i come in?"

"Yeah come in" Christian muttered.

"What's going on i heard shouting...?" Stephanie looked at Andrews stomach and saw how he couldn't button his pants or his open shirt for that matter. She looked at Christian and he began to tear up. "Owe Andrew, I'm so sorry. You know with what you're going through this is natural. You're bound to lose and gain weight, don't beat yourself up about it."

"Yeah well, I am. And i can't help but be pissed off about it. It's making me so insecure and now i can't even fit into my fucking costume, i hate that everyone has to see me like this." And with that Andrew stood up sharply and began to change back into his grey tracksuit bottoms and bed shirt since not alot fit him anymore.

Christian stood up and turned Andrew round to face him. He hated seeing his lover like this, it was it too much. Christian wrapped his arms around Andrews waist and Andrew wrapped his around Christian.

Stephanie had nothing to say, she hated to see Andrew like this aswell but like Christian had no idea how to help. "I'll leave you two alone" she murmered

"I'm sorry steph" whispered Rannells as he walked towards her with open arms. "My nerves are getting the best of me and I don't know how to get it out apart from ranting"

"Please don't be sorry, you can't help it"