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in fairy tales, everyone gets to live their happily ever after and the bad guy will never bother the prince and the princess ever again.
that's a whole lot of nonsense.
maybe at the end of the day, i was getting therapy for my metal issues, i was married and having another child; but to think that there will be no more problems in the near future is not wise. the bad guy will always return.
and for me, the bad guy is in the form of my own demons.
to think back, my rapist was never caught; those two guys who harrassed me on the side of the streets were never arrested; i never went back to school and my baby was never brought back to life. but that's life. and that's not the therapist in me talking.
i will forever be haunted with nightmares with my past regrets catch up with me. no amount of medication can change that.
and when it comes back to my unborn child, she will no longer be a regret. she will no longer be something i hate myself for.
in honor and in love for her, I will name my next child something pure.
because that child was innocent and pure. it had done nothing wrong, she was just introduced to the world at the wrong time. i believe this one will be also be a girl.
so i will name her Afaaf. someone who is chaste and unclouded.
may that be the best for her.
***
love, starlightyoong
YOU ARE READING
afaaf
Cerita Pendek•Completed• "i'm sorry. it's not pity that i'm showing you, it's a goodbye to someone very special to me." Amna's life has been turned upside down and she is writing it all out as she buries the anguish burning inside her.
