Side Effects ✄ L.H

One ✄ Sympathy

i hate school, i hate it so much. i hate it more than the hospital and i spend most of my time in there anyway. no one actually likes me at school, they just feel bad for me because of the cancer. that's a side effect of cancer, sympathy. everyone feels bad for you because you're going to die. they don't need to like you or know you at all, they will just feel bad for you. that's how i got an A* on my french test, i'm rubbish at french and i didn't even study, there was no way i actually deserved that grade.

i took a deep breath as i stepped out of my brothers car, "have fun, i'll see you tonight!" Mason said, giving me a quick wave before he drove off to his job. i pulled up the handle on my oxygen tank and slowly dragged it into school.

"would you like some help?" a girl asked running over to me, trying to grab the handle. i pulled it away from her and shook my head. she gave me a small smile, symapthy shining in her green eyes. why must everyone feel bad for me? "o-okay, see you around grace." and why does everyone have to know my name? i continued making my way into school and i straight away went to my form room, i was allowed, obviously because of the cancer on my lungs, which means i can't breath properly, that's why i need to oxygen tank.

as i walked into the room i was shocked to find a boy with blonde hair styled into a quiff and bright blue eyes, already sat in the room. his head was bowed and his eyes were fixed on the desk but as soon as i shut the door his head shot up to face me, i was almost scared that he snapped his neck he did it that fast. a smile instantly grew on his face as well as dimples, i blushed slightly then looked away suddenly feeling self concious. i ran a hand threw my short black hair and made my way to my assigned seat, which just so happend to be behind the boy.

he turned to face me as i sat down in my chair. "i'm luke!" he said, extending his hand to me, "i'm new!" i quickly shook his hand then brought it back down to my side, instantly pulling my sleeve over it. "and you're name is..."

"oh, it's g-grace l-l-lane." his smile grew even larger, if that was even possible.

"that's a beautiful name for such a beautiful girl." i sheepishly smiled at him. this felt different. he treat me differently to how everyone else did. he didn't treat me like i had only a few years maybe even months to live. he didn't seem sad for me, like everyone else did. he just treat me like i was normal. the only problem was that, like everyone else, he was staring at the tubes coming from my nose and leading to the oxygen tank.

"i have cancer on my lungs, i can't breath without it." i explained, he dropped his jaw dropped a little.

"i wasn't looking, i mean i wasn't-" he stuttered before i interupted him.

"it's fine, everyone does, it seems to either interest them or bother them." i shrugged my shoulders.

"why would it bother me? it's not your fault, anyway i didn't really notice it." he smiled at me.

"then why were you staring at me?" i questioned, still pulling at the sleeves on my top.

"because you're beautiful!" he smirked, my cheeks went bright red and i turned my head away from him to at

least try to save myself from more embaressesment. "sorry, i just can't help but stare at beautiful people, they make me happy." i giggled slightly, pushing his arm, which had been lent on my desk, away.

"stop!" i laughed, "this is so embaressing!" i muttered.

"why?" he asked, placing his hand on top of mine, his hand was so warm and soft, but slightly rough, "it's true, you're just really beautiful!"

the bell rung loud throughout the school, interupting mine and luke's coversation. the form group piled into the room, talking laughing, listening to music. i turned my gaze away from luke and focused on my desk, and, as rude as it sounds, i listened to everyone's conversation. but the only one's that interested me were the one's about me.

"i feel so bad for her!" a girl spoke, just sat at the next desk across from me.

"who?" her friend spoke, already sounding bored with the conversation.

"grace! i mean look, she has to haul around that tank all day and she has those tubes coming out of her nose and..."

i scoffed at that part, of course she didn't feel bad for me because i have cancer, she feels bad for me because of how i look and what i have do to keep myself alive.

no one is ever sympathetic for the cancer, they are only sympathetic for what they can see.