~Without You~ •Jeffmads Fanfic• √

~A Friend~

Warning: Abuse + Suicidal thoughts and that this story is messed up

*Madison P. O. V.*

All I could do was smile at Thomas Jefferson. I was grateful to have a light in the mists of darkness.

Thank you... Really, I'll see you around Thomas.

I scribbled onto a piece of paper, then gave it to Thomas.

"Alright bye James."
Thomas said then pulled me into a hug again.

I smiled into his chest and hugged back.

I looked up and gave him a genuine smile again. Then I let go of him and he let go of me.

I waved at him while walking away.

"Bye Jemmy!!"
Thomas shouted while running back to his neighbourhood.

I blushed at the sudden name. When I finally saw Thomas's figure disappear I walk back home. A sudden wave of panic went to me.

I need to get home.
I thought to myself.

I ran as fast as I could back to the house and once I made it; I prayed that my father wasn't awake. I slowly walk to the front door. Already smelling alcohol. I take a deep breath and turn the door knob.

I see my dad passed out on the couch. I let out a sigh of relief. I quickly run upstairs and immediately go to my room.

I looked in my closet to find some sleeping clothes. Perfect a comfy sweater and some lose jogging pants. I changed quickly and crawled into my bed.

Now I'm alone with my thoughts.

Wonderful.

I stared at the ceiling wondering if my sister was okay.

What if father finds out Nelly is gone?
No he wouldn't he's too careless about his children.

Wait what would mother think about me and my current condition?
She would think you're weak.

Would she be proud of calling me her son? Probably not.

Why are you pathetic and weak?
It's a specialty of mine I can't explain why.

Does Thomas actually care about you?
I-I don't know?

I didn't notice tears falling from my eyes. I let out a sigh then a quiet sob. That's when the voices came.

No one cares about you.       Go die.  
      You thought people cared?    You're useless.
Crybaby.     Selfish.     Worthless.      Empty.
   Pathetic.      Confused.     Broken and alone.        Your not good enough.    Lonely.  Just leave.

Please stop!

I desperately covered my ears and closed my eyes. Begging for the voices to stop but it never did. Instead I cried and tried to sleep. Eventually I met the dreamworld.

I gently fluttered my eyes open seeing the world again. The sun was streaming from my window and I heard birds chirping. I was calm for a quick second then realized I was in my fathers house.

I looked at the shattered clock. 10:00 am. My eyes widened. Work is in 30 minutes! I ran to the closest and threw on an outfit. I didn't care how I looked I just needed to go to work. Well I also tried to cover up all the bruises but that didn't matter right now.

I quietly walked out of the house making sure my father didn't wake up. After I was out of the house I sprinted to the supermarket. I work in the supermarket because my father would never give Nelly and I food.