Darling Chaos

9. Darling

Darling's smile lit up the world.

It was as if all of the birds had begun to chirp once more. The sun finally shone and dried up the tears that the clouds had shed. The cold withered into warmth and the ever-present gloominess quickly dissipated.

The whole world seemed to be affected by the smile that Darling had woken up with.

She had whipped out of bed, her feet hitting the floor beneath her and, for the first time since she could remember, her body felt light. Like there was nothing weighing it down and pressing upon her.

Like she was free.

Her first thought, standing and glancing around her room, was something along the lines of: Oh my gosh my room is a disaster...

But then she saw the sun.

The glorious rays of sun, peeking through the curtains that had blocked it out for so long. She drew them back, looking down at the bright, bustling city below.

She had the urge to draw it. To paint it. To capture that moment.

Because right then, she felt alive.

The decision Darling had made to stop thinking of Chaos was not only a conscious decision, but a subconscious one. Her mind would not allow a single thing to remind her of what she missed so dearly, as if refusing to let her smile fade once more. Although Darling was still broken, still healing, she would no longer sit around acting that way. She may have been faking a smile, but she was so convinced that it was a real, genuine smile and that she really felt genuinely happy. It wouldn't be long until that actually became a real, genuine smile and she would begin to feel true joy once more.

Finally parting from the window, Darling whisked toward the bathroom, flicking on the bathroom light and catching a glimpse of herself in the mirror. Yes, she was thinner. And she certainly looked tired. Nearly a corpse of her former self.

But Darling covered it up quite easily, masking the hurt and heartache with concealer and mascara. After brushing her long, unruly hair and fixating it into a braid that trailed down her back, Darling looked almost exactly as she once had.

In the mirror, Darling watched her lips pull into a smile.

It was such a foreign feeling, and Darling realized just how much she had missed it.

Darling was quick to get back into her previous schedule. She hurried to school and was quick to participate and learn just as she had done before. She jumped right back into her job with her old attitude, which her coworkers appreciated and missed.

Nobody liked seeing Darling without a smile on her face, it was just something that looked wrong. Darling was someone known for her constant smile. So that day, her peers and coworkers were immensely grateful that the Darling that they knew and cared for was back, and (seemingly) better than ever.

After work, Darling made her way through the city streets and back to her apartment building. She glanced up, catching a glimpse of the fairy lights twinkling on top of the roof.

And suddenly, Darling was overtaken with sadness.

She hurried into the complex, running up the stairs and down the hallway that led to her apartment. But instead of unlocking her door, she turned to knock on Justice's door.

Justice was quick to welcome Darling in, and greeted her with a smile. The two of them sat on his couch, exchanging formalities until Justice noticed Darling's uneasy stance and inquired as to why she seemed to be so deep in thought.

Darling cocked her head, a grin spreading over her face.

"I'm sorry, Justice. But I was just thinking of giving the roof a makeover. Would you like to help me?"

He agreed, without hesitation. He found himself beginning to grow fond of Darling, this beautiful girl that had once captured his friend's heart. And now, with a constant twinkle in her eyes and happiness radiating throughout her presence, he found himself wanting to get to know Darling better. Ever since the start, she had only been the alluring girl whom his roommate disappeared to be with in the night. He had known nothing more than her name and her face, only seeing her in hallways and on the screen of Chaos' camera from time to time. He couldn't bring himself to part from her, nor send her away to face tearing down memories on her own.

The two of them made their way up to the roof, cardboard boxes in hand.

They started with the easier things, replacing couch cushions and picking up remnants of what had been. They made small talk, but it didn't seem to go anywhere. Darling didn't even know what to think about when confronting the past so brazenly.

"Screw it!" Darling exclaimed, exasperated. She dropped the papers in her hand and rushed towards the couch, pulling out a box from underneath. Justice, from afar, watched as she opened it up and shuffled through a box of multicolored lanterns.

"How do you plan on hanging these up?" Justice spoke up with uncertainty, his chest tight with anticipation. Did she know he was still there? Would she get angry or break down because he had spoken up? Instead of what he feared her reaction would be, Darling smiled up at him and caused him to release a sigh of relief.

"Would you be able to lift me up and hand me the lanterns to hang over the lights?"

Justice responded with nothing more than a nod, whisking Darling up onto his shoulders and grinning as she giggled. He knelt down, carefully picking up a handful of lanterns and handing them, one by one, to Darling. She delicately placed them over the fairy lights, covering up the past with the present.

After no time at all, filled up with bubbles of conversation and laughter, Justice let Darling down from his shoulders and stepped beside her to take in their masterpiece.

Darling couldn't lull the tears that bubbled up in her eyes. She was finally taking the steps that would lead her back to happiness. The steps that would help her regain the pieces of identity and self-respect she had once lost.

She looked to her left and grinned at Justice, her heart skipping a beat as he grinned back.

Her hand found his, and their eyes met.

Love is not a feeling of happiness, it is the willingness to sacrifice to make someone else happy.