Nightmares of a Beast

Throbbing scars and caring words

S_Pov

"Seth!!! you fucking idiot, why the hell did you do that!? You could've died!!" He cried. All he got from me was a grimace and a stare. I really hadn't thought this through. My body just moved, and I ended up becoming a human shield because of it. Instead of doing anything about it, I  answer his previous question. 

"I never said you couldn't go. You chose to stay on your own. I never said anything to make you stay, but I was glad you didn't leave" I say. His eyes are troubled but I can tell he's trying to keep a torrent of emotions in control.

"I don't even know why I stayed in the first place, Seithen. Why I even tried to understand you" His whisper is so soft I can barely hear it. he's sitting up against the oven door and before i can stop him, he's standing straight up and into the handle of the soup ladle. The ladle flips and the scorching substance stains his exposed flesh a angry red. He doesn't even care as the ladle falls to the floor and stares into my eyes with his tear streaked ones. The tears are cascading down his face but he doesn't wipe them away, he's racked with tears and clenches his shirt inside his fist.  "It hurts. It fucking hurts! Seithen!" I get to my feet and balance the mostly empty pot on the edge of the sink. "It'll be okay Callum, I'll get you something for the burn. Stay here, I'll get bandages and ointment." Callum shakes his head and looks up at me with fresh tears dripping off his chin. "God damn it Seithen, I don't need a fucking aspirin! I just need to get the hell away from here" When he says those words, I didn't even blink. I think in some way I understand what he's saying. I wouldn't want to be around me either. Nice guy huh, knocks you out and is nice enough but in the end he's unbearable to be around. "I get it, you can go" He's almost disbelieving when he looks up, the emptyness of his eyes scaring me. "Fine" he says softly, Cal shakes off whatever he meant to say next and walks away. His back is streaked with crusting stew and the flesh peeking from the neckline was an angry bubblegum pink; as if it was saying 'Its all your fault, you did this.' I don't know what to do, just watching him pack his sparse belongings into his backpack has me stunned. It's like none of this is so real, everything feels so far away. 'Whats happening to me?'

The door slams and I finally snap back to reality. 'What in the world did I just do?' He's really gone. The blankets are messy and rumpled on the sofa where I slept, and the brown felt fabric's pouring off it's edge. The sheets in the bedroom are flung halfway as if he was rushing to pop out of bed this morning. The left drawer of the dresser looking slightly ajar, one of the many white bandannas peeking out. I move to close it but something catches my eye, a folded piece of paper tucked tight against the drawers side. I pinch the corner of the lined paper between my thumb and finger, tugging it from it's place. I unfold it and smooth the surface on the top of the dresser, watching the small and stick like figures scrawled across the page. I Scan the scrawny figures down the page, lips mouthing the words. Song Lyrics? Letting out a light laugh, I fold the paper back up and slip it into my pocket. 'Who knew he wrote song lyrics?' Grumbling, I sweep my fingers through my hair and pull the skin under my eyes with the pads of my finger tips. Time to hose down. 

Popping into the shower, I exit the bathroom into my room and towel myself dry. pulling on boxers, I roll onto the messy bed covers and lace my fingers behind my head; thinking about what I had done. "Was it necessary?' I can't get over how wrong it feels. I've gotten too used to the constant sound of feet stumbling over the floorboards and quiet breathing from the bedroom. It's weird but for the short while I had known Callum, I grew attached as if he was a lost puppy on my door step. "I must be crazy" I sighed and rolled over, eyes staring into nothing while waiting for sleep. It never came. And when morning did, dark circles hugged the bags under my eyes and my entire body ached like a giant sore. Getting up repeatedly to train and exercise, taking my mind off everything was probably the cause. I feel like getting crazy today. "What to do, what to do..." An Idea formed in my head. I took baggy pants and a white t-shirt and put them on, Omelette was folded into a blueberry waffle and my keys were shoved into the sweatshirt tied at my waist, right before bounding out the door nearly barefoot. Minutes after, I was outside the building complex on the street breathing the chilly morning air from behind the new addition of a blue cotton scarf. I hailed a cab took it to the air strip. A plane and an instructor waited for me, the engines on the plane already running. I walked across the airstrip and handed him my gold card. After our quick transaction, I entered the plane and suited up. Black zipper suit over my clothes and the sweatshirt again around my waist. Keys, phone, and wallet in my pants pockets, I strapped on the parachute and leaned into the plane's seat. i flagged the flight attendant and asked for a drink to steady my nerves. She rolled out the cart and I picked up a handful of small mouthwash sized bottles and putting them in the cup holder in the armrest of my seat. The flight attendant rolled the cart away and stood back in her corner and leaving me to down my handful of drink while visibly relaxing into the creme colored seat. soon after, I was shaken awake by the instructor and stumbling for the door. Despite the insistent shouts of the instructor, my mind blocked the sound of his voice diminishing it to a pleasant buzz in my head.  I popped open the air locked door and turned around blinking around blurry vision; and like the fool I was, I smiled and fell backwards from the side of the plane. The last thing I heard before the wind in my ears, was the high pitched scream of the flight attendant watching me fall at the frame of the door. 

        The feeling of falling is amazing. The wind brushing past your head and whipping through your hair, body spinning and turning in the the air. Free falling.