Glasses & Dimples.

Glasses & Dimples. 2

CHAPTER TWO

Three years after my birth, I'm always found in the library of our home. Not like I can read, I just like the idea of being able to read. My parents are very well to do, like very. We live in Maitama, Abuja. It is known to be one of the most prominent places in Abuja. It's where the rich people live.

Every day, I would go to the library and pick up a book. Then I would begin to read out loud. Not words from the book but words from my head. These words were my words, stories I was able to make up in a heartbeat.

Making up stories was never hard for me. I was very good with my imaginations. My parents noticed it and they found it cute.

At age ten I had to get a pair of medicated glasses cause I couldn't see well when I read or wrote. I also couldn't see my surroundings properly, I was actually long-sighted. This pissed me off. I hated my glasses, I looked like a geek, of which I can promise you I'm not. Forget the fact that I always get A's in all my subjects, it's just luck. And it's not like the subjects are difficult, they are quite very easy. I wonder why the school never gave me double promotion sef.

Anyway, my life took a drastic turn on my sixteenth birthday. This is because reality hit me in the head like a baseball. It hurt so bad I cried for two days. You see, I found out that I'll never get kissed in my life. In fact, I'll never have a boyfriend. Do you want to know why? Well, it's because of my father. Let me explain this properly.

My parents are strong Christians. Not only that, my dad is a general in the Military while my mum is a nurse. Popsi is soft when it comes to his family but hard as a rock when it comes to his troops. I never knew he'll display these traits to anyone in his family until the day he found out about my crush. Popsi wasn't happy, he wasn't happy at all. Since then he was all in my business. He would ask questions like; how many friends do you have? Are there boys among? Do you have a boyfriend? Do your friends have boyfriends?

My gosh, but it was too much.

Then my birthday came and I knew that if I didn't do something quick about getting a kiss from my crush or at least get him alone, I'll never have a boyfriend, which means I'll never get kissed. I'll become a spinster for the rest of my life having cats as my constant companion.

Anyway, my crush; Kenny of whom I have loved all my life came to my sixteenth birthday party. It was celebrated in my house. It was like the biggest party of the year. Everyone in my school came and I mean everyone. Okay not everyone just those that wanted to come.

Anyway, they came and so did Kenny. A few minutes after my birthday party was over, some of my best friends; Rachel, and Jojo stayed behind, along with Kenny and his friends, of whom I've forgotten their names( doesn't matter).

We decided to play a game; truth or dare. I was over the moon. With us playing this game, I'll have the opportunity to kiss Kenny, finally.

But there was a slight problem; my parents. If they were to know the game we were about to play I'll be dead.

So we decided to take it up to my room ( I know dumb idea) of all places, my room, why didn't I think of a better place?

Anyway, our game began, truth or dare.

Everyone had kissed each other except me. When it came to my turn to get dared to kiss Kenny, Popsi just showed up from nowhere.

"What are you kids doing?" he asked standing at my now open door like the terminator.

Just then my little sis, Tari, jumped out of my closet screaming.

"They are kissing each other dad, it's a kissing game" she giggled then continued by singing " Boma and Kenny sitting on a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G" then she raced out of my room like wild dogs were after her.

We all sat there on the floor in a circle stunned as we watched her performance.

Firstly, we didn't know how she got into my room, like when did she get in? We were certain we left her and my brother downstairs before we came up.

Then secondly, what do you do when your dad just heard that you are partaking in a kissing game, how do you handle that situation?

Well as you guessed right, it wasn't handled properly.

Popsi sent every one of my friends home. I was grounded for two weeks; no phone, no laptop, no T.V. luckily for me, I had my books. So I read to chase the boredom away.

A few years later, I'm eighteen years old and ready for the university. I got admission into the University of Abuja, I was ecstatic. But my jovial aura was tarnished by my look of geekiness. My glasses and dimples cut off my ability to establish a cordial relationship with the cute guys in my school. So my dad virtually had to do nada to stop me from having a boyfriend, my look was already doing a dang good job for me.

This brings us to now. I am twenty-eight years old and I have never been kissed. I don't even know what if feels like to be kissed. My dad has had me on a leash since I was sixteen, it's like he's scared that once I get a boyfriend I'll instantly become pregnant. Like seriously?

Pshh...

Well, we've established the fact that I'm an all-around virgin. You know what that means right? No kissy, no sexing, nada. Meaning; I've never been pecked on the lips, kissed on the lips and I've never had sex. I'm sure if I go to a church to apply to be a nun, I'll be overqualified, they'll make me head of all nuns.

Anyhoot, this a story about a twenty-eight-year-old virgin with glasses and dimples, on a mission to get hooked on her twenty-ninth birthday and how she got arrested on the night before her wedding.

Let's begin.