Star Crossed

(6) How to lose control.

NATHAN FORD.

I could still feel it, her lips on mine, tongue fighting for dominance against mine... And that had been three hours ago.

School had closed but, I was still at the same spot she was, whimpering underneath me and debating on kissing me back or not.

Heavens and hell knew just how much I wanted that girl and just how much I could never have her.

I almost lost all sense of reasoning when Tobi raised his hands against her... How dare he? She was mine to hurt...everything about her was mine and no one had the right to touch her without my permission.

You hate her.

I reminded myself as I walked back home, kicking used cans on the way unconsciously, hands in my pocket and head bowed deep in thought.

Earlier in my class, I was confused. I didn't know what to feel at all... What I knew was, I didn't want anyone touching her except me. I was the only one who could hurt her... Only I.

And it seemed I did my job just well, seeing as she was crying.

Then why did my heart feel so burdened seeing those tears staining her beautiful face?

Why did guilt and anger eat me up just seeing how sad she was?

Don't sympathize with her man, that's how they all behave... The whites... It's who they are so don't let this one deceive you.

My heart reminded me and I couldn't help but, recall her previous outburst.

**

As soon as my fingers grazed her breasts, she moaned into my mouth, arching her back closer to me, wanting to feel more of my touch... A pleasure I would willingly give to her... Anyday.. Anytime.

I wanted to stop.

It wasn't supposed to go like this, I was supposed to threaten her and make her cry more if possible... I wasn't supposed to be craving her touch and demanding her head turning kisses... Nor was my heart supposed to be beating so fast at the sight of her.

I was angry... At my lack of control, something I never seemed to posses, when I was with her.

Angry with myself, I growled into her mouth and pressed her more hard and painfully against the wall that wasn't cemented, wanting to draw pain... For what she did to me, for every maltreatment she gave me... For breaking me... Making me who I was today... For ruining my life... For-

Suddenly she pushed me away, pain, frustration and lust glistering her eyes.

I took step back.

I hurt her...

I growled, running my hands through my hair.

"I don't understand y-" she made to talk, her voice shaking and I growled, pinning her down, my hands wrapped around her neck not tight enough to wound her but tight enough to scare her.

"Pass through that corridor and I won't spare you next time." I seethed, aware of the students that had now gathered to watch us.

But I didn't care... I never cared about people watch or what they thought about me... They could all rot in hell.

I stepped back and she suddenly hit my chest, crying profusely now.

"If that was a fucking rule, you should have included it in the school's fucking prospectus... You irresponsible fools!" She yelled and walked away.