HELPLINE

NINE

N I N E // I S A A C

I was having one of those mornings.

You know the sort. Would Henry Waters prefer my tartan shirt (more hipster) or a simpler, classier, blue button-down?

It took me an hour, but I chose the tartan one. It seemed like something Henry would like.

Then I spilled cereal (it keeps coming up) all over my best jeans, burnt my hand on the kettle, and broke a priceless family heirloom.

All in a day's work, really.

But, finally, it got to twelve-thirty, and Henry arrived arrived on the dot - as my Mother would say - grinning, for some reason.

"Nice shirt," he said, as i locked the door.

We got the train out of London to some little pet store Shania had recommended; apparently, it was where she and Mike had bought their dog.

"You're going an awfully long way for this cat," Henry said dryly, when we were half an hour into our journey.

I blushed. "i just really like cats."

"Me too. You're not so bad, either."

❄

Eventually, we reached the place - a barn called 'Raining Cats and Dogs' - and immediately, we were greeted by hundreds (alright, maybe not hundreds) of cats, dogs, rabbits, and several other animals my life in London has made me not very good at recognising.

I think one of them was a sheep?

A plump lady called Mary-Lou showed us around ("this is Ben, he's a bit smelly but a total sweetheart") and Henry occasionally made some snarky comments, but it wasn't actually long before I found the perfect one.

"Henry, look," I said, pointing to a three-legged tabby cat whose nameplate read Ella.

"Oh," he said, momentarily softening. "She's pretty damn cute."

Mary-Lou visibly brightened. "Oh, Ella's lovely, Isaac. she's been here for months but people never give her a second glance, what with her three legs and all."

"She's gorgeous," I said. "We'll - I mean, I'll take her."

"Brilliant," Mary-Lou said, beaming. "Honestly, you couples make my day."

"Oh," I said, cheeks burning. "We're not -"

"Yeah, not really -"

"A couple -"

"As such."

"Just friends!" I finished, as Mary-Lou snickered to herself. "So, er, how about that cat, Mary-Lou?"

❄

"So, are you going to keep calling her Ella?" Henry asked, as I let us into my flat.

"Yes," I said, letting Ella out of her cage. "Because I name all my cats after strong female singers, and Lorde's first name is Ella -"

"And she's about the strongest female singer you can get," Henry said, closing the door so Ella wouldn't run outside. What an intellectual.

"Exactly," I grinned, and then we settled into silence.

"So," Henry said, laughing fakely. "How about Mary-Lou thinking we were a couple? Hilarious, right?"

"Absolutely," I joined in, with some of the worst fake-laughter I've ever heard. "I mean, I've got no idea where she got that from."

"You could say it was barking mad of her," Henry added, and I burst out laughing.

What?

It was pretty funny.

❄

a.n: edited 13/11/15. americans, that's how to properly write a date. i'll let you off on the basis of donald trump's existence