Finding Forever

Chapter 6

The night Julian stayed we didn't have sex, we just made out hot and heavy with only our shirts off. I'm not ready just yet but I feel that I'm almost there. That night was four weeks ago and we've been taking turns staying at each other's apartments on the weekends.

"Hey Bray," Julian's voice floats from behind me from the living room.

Walking with Archer (who's now 11 months old) on my hip, I walk into the living room with a smile and a cocked eyebrow. Julian's sitting on the love seat with his phone, scrolling through something.

"Yes," I answer him still staring at his perfection, amazed that he's willing to be my friend and has been since the first night he stayed at mine. He asked me while we were lying in bed, cuddled together with my head on his chest under his chin as he had me wrapped in his arms.

"Who's Ryan Carlson?" at his question, my face drained of all color.

"How do you know him?" I'm trying to keep the fear from my voice but it did waiver while I talked.

Julian looks at me quickly noticing my voice. "Baby, what's wrong?" he asks ignoring my question as he stands to come to Archer and I.

"I I don't know, honestly. How do you know him?" I repeat voice still shaky as I tighten my hold on Archer some.

"He had posted on facebook that he's searching for you, used your name in his post."

Gulping, I look at my boyfriend with pleading eyes. "Don't tell him, please. He's the one who, um, rapped me. He's Archer's other father, I don't want him to know where we are. He's not on Archer's birth certificate but I'm still scared he's going to try and take him from me."

By now I'm full on sobbing into Julian's chest as he tightly holds Archer and I to him as he rubs my back with a hand. "Baby, I promise I won't let him take Archer or harm either of you."

Pulling away slightly to look into his eyes, finding only honesty and determination. Nodding slowly at him, I settle back into his hold, calming completly a few minutes later.

Julian helps me finish making lunch for the three of us since Archer has been eating more regular food than his baby food and formula. Next month on his birthday, I'm switching him to regular milk gradually until that's all he's drinking.

Tomorrow night, Amy, Patrick and Abby are coming over to my place to have dinner with Archer, Julian and I. I'm offically introducing Julian to them, he knows about my life and who they are to me. I'm still not comfortable calling them mom and dad and I may never. Only time will tell for sure. I'm just glad that they understand that I don't want Parker around my son unless he can curb his hate comments about my sexulaity and my son.

Another week has passed. As I bathe Archer I finally decide that tonight is the night that if Julian wants, I'm ready to have sex with him. After Archer is in bed of course, I couldn't do that while my son is awake. Julian has been so patient with me about having sex. He's always reassuring me that we will only have sex when I'm ready and not a moment sooner. Bless him for this, since most people wouldn't be as patient.

The night we had the family dinner at mine, it went better than I had expected. Everyone loved Julian and he them. I couldn't have asked for a better night than what we had. Everyone talked and joked eaisly with each other. It made my heart soar with happiness.