It's not an S // Superman

Chapter 27

To Metropolis and to the world, Superman is our only hope. A guardian angel sent to us from another world. To me, he is the man that I have loved since I was a little girl, the man who I had met a long time ago in that school corridor in Smallville. To me, he is Clark. To me, he is everything.

Leaving his side as the final battle with Zod loomed, is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
There was no guarantee that Clark would win, no promise he would even survive to the end. I had to trust him though, had to have faith. He couldn't concentrate on what he had to do with me there. He had to be a hundred percent focused. To do that, I had to take myself out of the equation.

Once I'd finally torn myself away, Perry more or less dragged me to the outer perimeters of the city. Every now and again you'd hear an all mighty bang, the sound of yet another building collapsing, or glass smashing to smithereens.
I couldn't bare to look, couldn't bring myself to open my eyes. Even with everything I've been through, at that moment I'd never been more terrified. The fight was causing those sounds. Clark was causing those sounds. Please let him be ok.

After what felt like a millennia, the bangs, the crashes, the sounds of battle stopped. All that was left was crying from people around me and a background of eerie silence. The fight was over. But who had won?

"Did you see where they went?" I asked in despair of a random person at my side, their eyes wet with tears and hands trembling as mine were.

"It looked like they crashed through the roof of the station," the lady muttered with a croak.

At hearing that, I didn't wait, didn't hesitate to make my way over there. I moved so fast that Perry didn't even realise I was gone until I was completely out of sight.

Running through the destroyed streets I had time to think over the two outcomes. Either Clark had won and we were all safe or Clark had lost, could possibly be dead and the world as we knew it would end.

Just the thought of Clark possibly being dead shook me to my core, to my soul. If he was gone what did I have left? What did I have to live for? He had to be ok. He just had to be.

Reaching the entrance to the train station the first indication I had to Clark being alive was an ear piercing scream that literally made the building shake.

Taking a deep breath I made my way through the entrance and into the main terminal, the last few people caught up in it all running in the opposite direction around me.

What I saw when I spotted Clark was an image that will live with me forever.
Yes he'd won. Yes the enemy was dead at his feet. But he still looked defeated. Still looked broken.
Clark was on his knees, Zod's lifeless body laid in front of him.
The tears that ran down Clark's face were of mourning, grief.

Imagine going your whole life feeling like you don't belong, like you don't fit in, only to find someone who shares your blood, your planet, your abilities.
Then imagine how it would feel to lose that, that new sense of belonging, that feeling of no longer being alone. That's how Clark is feeling now. That's what Clark was having to deal with.

Slowly making my way over to him, the scene even more upsetting the closer I got, I tried to think of what to say, how to make him feel better.
When he looked at me, locked eyes with mine all I saw was a sudden look of relief, of love. It was then I knew I didn't need to say anything. I just needed to be there. Be by his side.

"I'm so sorry Clark," I whispered after a few minutes, Clark still on his knees but with his arms wrapped around my waist and head rested on my stomach.

"I had to do it. He would never have stopped."

"I just don't want you to feel alone now," I worried, running my fingers through his hair and trying to hold back tears.

Hearing that, Clark realising how I thought he felt, he jumped to his feet, his palms resting on either side of my face, "I don't feel alone. As long as I have you I have everything I need."

"Well I'm not going anywhere," I smiled sincerely whilst staring straight into his eyes.

With a gulp, looking like he knew something I didn't, Clark pulled me to his chest protectively, his lips pressing soft kisses to my scalp as he muttered the final words he would say before flying us away.

"That's all that matters. You're all that matters."