3rd Wheel

Life Beautiful

Candon:

Our little Imani grew like a weed.  She doubled her birth weight after two weeks.  She had a soft olive complexion and my hazel greens and dark hair.  Five year old Lyn and three year old Kyrie loved her to death.  They were always helping one of us when we fed, changed, or bathed her.  They dominated her play time and we almost didn't get to play with her at all.  I was overjoyed they took to her so well and didn't pay any attention to the face that she wasn't the same color as them.  She was their little sister.

 Two months after the birth of Imani, Paul's mom passed. It was the most beautiful passing I'd ever seen. She had been napping with all the little ones and passed with them in her arms. There was a smile on her lips and she looked positively radiant with the light shining behind her. The three of us just stood in the doorway too struck to move. There were tears but there were also smiles. Jay took a picture before we took the children out and called hospice.

We showed Paul's siblings the photo. They said the same thing. Mom looked so peaceful and happy. When planning the final details of her funeral we opted to make it a happy celebration. A celebration of life.

Everyone wore white instead of black. We played her favorite songs, ate her favorite foods, told stories, jokes, and shared memores. We didn't opt for a burial. Paul and his siblings wanted to do something more memorable so they had her turned into a tree and planted her in the back yard. I was against it at first (because I'm superstitious and all but I won't tell them that)  but they convinced me saying she could watch over the kids she held so dear and provide shade and a play area for them.

Not too long after, I started really thinking about things. Gil had been kidnapped and the agency was going nuts trying to find him. Three of Danielo's cousins, Sergio- former military, and twins Raffaelle and Filipe-ex cops joined the agency as well as Kohl's long time friend and a former gangster, Paine. Through legal and illegal means we used every agency, crime organization, and creep on the streets to find him.

When we did it sucked the life out of me. He was intersexed and had been pregnant. The crime family that took him and the woman he was protecting, tortured them both. He lost his child.

That night I pulled all my loved ones into the master bed and held them tight. I didn't say anything. I just held them for dear life. My husbands said nothing.  They just cuddled up close.  They must have known I needed this.

The next morning, Jay and Paul were shocked to find every bottle of alcohol empty on the counter. They both ran up to me and sniffed me to see if alcohol would bleed from my pores. I had to laugh at this. After assuring them I didn't drink a drop of it, I explained what happened with Gil and that I wanted to change some things in my life to be a better husband and father.

They were overjoyed and I was quite proud of myself.  

The agency was expanding.  I had two husbands and three small ones under six.  There were sleepless nights, arguments, tantrums, diaper changes, and bottle feedings.  We woke up cranky and sleepy looking ten years older but I was happy.  The smiles on their faces, their hugs and kisses, their smells and their whispers of love were everything.

My husband Paul. Playful, open minded, a kid at heart. My sweet Jaeger. The glue that holds us all together. Gentle, passionate, adventurous. Little Lyn. Even at such a young age she's a bundle of energy and a protector over her siblings. Kyrie, a protector also but very gentle and creative. And baby Imani, our latest ray of sun.

These were the most important people in the world. If anything happened to them, I'd blow up the world and sit in jail happy.