3rd Wheel

Moments

cover by  akaneaoto

Jaeger:

Of all the things we've been through over the years nothing could ever have prepared me for the phone call I received. I broke every traffic law in existence trying to get to the hospital when Candon said he was on the next thing leaving California and coming home.

Paul had been stabbed while at the park with our kids.

I felt so much rage. The system let that animal out of his cage. Then that sorry excuse for a human attacked my Paul in front of our kids. I wanted to run out and find him and pummel him until he was nothing.

As I parked in the garage and entered the hospital it was like I was moving in slow motion. I couldn't run fast enough to get to the information desk. When she told me where he was I didn't wait for the elevator I ran up the stairs. I didn't have time to wait. I needed to get there. I burst onto the floor and made a beeline for the room when I saw Holly and Danielo standing outside with my children.

Kyrie and Lyn were sleeping in Danielo's big arms and Imani was was gurgling and gnawing on her fist in Holly's. I kissed the two sleeping kids, smiling gratefully at Danielo. Then I took Imani and held her tightly. I inhaled her scent trying to calm down. Holly rubbed my back then lead me to a seat. Both men sat next to me and waited while Paul was in surgery.

It was getting late so I called my brother and sister to come for the kids. Being in a hospital with no toys or food was no way for kids to spend an evening. I sent Danielo home to his husband, he sent Quinn to take his place until Candon showed up. The three of us paced the halls, drank bad coffee, and waited four more hours. You'd almost think that was their husband in surgery.

The doctor and Candon burst through opposite ends of the hall at the same time. I met Candon halfway and hugged him tightly then we went hand in hand to face the doctor.

The doctor smiled at us as he took the cap off his head. "I just want to say he is one seriously lucky guy. The knife missed his major organs and we were able to repair an artery. He's going to be sore as hell but he will make a full recovery."

My knees turned to jelly and I sagged against Candon. Paul was going to make it! Candon kissed me all over my face and spoke softly to me as I cried. I even saw Quinn hold Holly tightly and rub his back. I wonder if they were together?

"Can we see him?"

The doctor nodded. "He's still under the anesthesia but you can see him for a few minutes."

At this point I was completely done with hospitals. Paul was so pale. His lips were blue and there were circles under his eyes. Despite his height and muscular build, he looked so small and frail lying in that hospital bed. I took his cold hand in mine and brought it to my lips. I felt a surge of anger course through my veins and bit back the hot tears. I wanted to tear out of that hospital and hunt down the man that did this.

Why? Why every time things are going well does shit keep happening to us? What the fuck?!

I felt a squeeze at the back of my neck and lips press to my temple.

"Breathe for me, baby boy."

"I don't want to breathe. I want to cut his fucking head off and kick it down the fucking street," I said through gritted teeth.

Candon nodded in understanding. "So do I. But Paul needs us right now."

"I'm tired of people fucking with us, Can."

"I know, baby."

That weekend Lyn and Kyrie's other relatives came to pick them up for their weekend visit. The grandmother was looking around our place with disgust as usual. I had to resist the urge to push her down the stairs. I went to the kitchen to get Kyrie's medicine. As I explained it to her she snatched it from me and stuffed it in her purse.

She sucked her teeth and rolled her eyes.  "Don't tell me what to do. I've raised six kids. I know what I'm doing."

"I never said you didn't. I was explaining the medicine," I said gently.

She snarled at me.  "You're just playing parent. You think you know everything."

"I never claimed-"

"Damn butt pirates. Think they are more motherly just cuz they take it up the ass and act a lil' feminine and shit."

I wish I could say I kept my cool. I wish I could say I was diplomatic and courteous. I wish I could say I let it roll off my back and chalked it up to ignorance. I wish I could say I respected my elders and took the high ground.

That would be a lie.

I lost all sensibility. I snatched my baby's medicine out her two dollar thrift store bag then proceeded to rip her a new one as I pushed her ass out of my house. I might have called her an unfit gangsta wannabe druggie of a mother. I might have insulted her weave job and poorly drawn on eyebrows. I might have insinuated the only reason she got pregnant was because she had to pay men to sleep with her and drug them so they'd be able to finish. I may have threatened to terminate her visitations.

I didn't care. I wasn't going to be the nice guy anymore. People thought they could keep walking over me. Nope. Not anymore.

When Candon came home and saw me in the yard with the kids, he of course asked what happened. I explained and he just doubled over with laughter.

When we got to the hospital, Paul's sister and brother were on their way out. They greeted us and the kids and said he was still sleeping. A side effect of the pain killers. The doctor told us he'd be able to leave in a few days and laid out his recovery plan for us.

Gil threw a surprise welcome home party for Paul when he came home from the hospital. Everyone from our wedding came, the guys from the agency came except the three brothers who were on an assignment, as did Ani and her partners. Everyone had a good time. We took turns catering to Paul who tried to get up and run with the kids. I learned a lot about the others.

Danielo and Gil were now a quad with Holly and Quinn. There were so many dynamics happening. There were some into bdsm, one that was strictly a bottom and one that was a switch, crossdressing, and on and on. Ani was in a triad with another woman and a man but she was only sexually involved with the man but shared emotional ties with both. Kohl and Paine were doms who shared the same subs on occasions.

I was amazed. I sat in a corner of the kitchen taking it all in. Gil bumped my shoulder. I smiled as I took in his appearance.

Despite everything he went through, he was still trying to be bubbly and happy. "How do you do it?" I asked.

His eyebrows furrowed. "What do you mean?"

"You've got three men to work with."

He laughed to himself. "We have our moments. We just accept each other as is and do a boatload of talking."

"You ever just want to just let it go?"

"I tried. I hated it."

I nodded.  "I can relate to that."

"The days you feel you don't have enough love, enough patience, enough time, enough anything are the days you have to ask yourself, 'would I be happy if I left?' If the answer is no then you have to keep going."

He waved his hand around at everything that was happening. "Then you get rewarded with things like this."

Danielo and Holly tackled Candon into the pool. My sister and Ani were with the kids by the swingset. My mother and Blaine were on the loungers laughing while my dad and the rest of the guys hung out by the grill. Ani's male partner was sitting on the porch with a sketchbook in hand trying to capture the moments.

I'd keep going. For moments like these.