Desperation

Morning Roll Call

Every morning I wake up.
I wake up to the calls of people drowning in problems.
I help them.
But stay up to help others.
Every morning I go into the bathroom.
Boost my self esteem.
But it only makes it worse.
Every morning I go to school.
I glue on my fake smile and stand proud.
I'm not proud.
But try and make others smile.
I make it through the day.
Barely.
Everyday.
I'm at the edge of a pool of tears.
I never shed.
I don't want people to feel my pain.
I go back and look at myself in the---
Mirror.
I still hate myself.
But people don't hate me.
I go back and look at myself in the mirror.
I don't love myself.
But people love me.
I go and sit alone and talk to myself.
I'm alone in my head.
But people are around me.
I go and sit alone and talk to myself.
I overthink.
But people think.
Under this smile is a frown.
The problems are making her drown.
But nobody sees her.
They just stay afloat.
No one rescues her.
As she's allowed to drown.
The only one allowed to drown.

------ By Justice ------