You Came Back {Troyler AU}

Chapter Two • The Confusing Life of Tyler Oakley

Tyler's POV

"No sleep again?" My mom asked as I walked into the kitchen, pulling out the Fruit Loop box from the small pantry.

Well of course not, my mother should know that by now. I hadn't had a good night's sleep in over a year, most of the time I only slept two or three hours a night, but recently, I just couldn't bring myself to close my eyes, fear jolting me awake every time I closed my eyes. I'd learned to just cope with minimal sleep in my life.

But at this point, there's really not much I can do about it. The same exact nightmare has been haunting me for as long as I can remember, and no matter what I do, it never seems to disappear.

Plus, insomnia is pretty much guaranteed nowadays, with Tumblr always stealing away every teenager's sleep. If I had to choose between sleep and Tumblr, I'd choose Tumblr in less than a heartbeat. Trust me.

I sighed, seeing the worried look on my mom's face. "Sleep is overrated." I mumbled, not giving any effort to conceal exactly how sleep deprived I was. Nonetheless, she laughed anyways, and I smirked, amused that I made someone laugh with my dry humor. Not many people understood it, so when anyone laughed at my jokes or puns, it made my day a little more tolerable. She pulled out a white porcelain cereal bowl and set it in front of me, then resumed getting ready for work, fidgeting around, mumbling to herself. She overworked herself to the brink of insanity, always staying late at work, getting home close to midnight, waking up at six every morning without fail. Each day was like clockwork, set off without a hitch, the same exact routine every day. Every. Single. Day.

I opened the cereal box, tearing it a little bit in the process, and poured some in the bowl in front of me.

"Thanks Mom." I said, trying to start a conversation. I grabbed the milk and poured it into the bowl as well.

"Yeah, no problem Ty! But can I ask why you have to wear that jacket every day?" I smirked, looking down at the now very worn black leather jacket that I did in fact wear every day.

I took a large bite of my cereal, taking my time to chew and swallow. "I'm cold." I shrugged, even though I was giving the same answer I always replied with when she asked that question. I could never tell her the truth, about who I was at school, about how different I was then she thought. I hadn't even come out to her yet. I hadn't come out to anyone...

Don't get me wrong, my mom is one of the sweetest most amazing people I know, but she can be very expressive when she doesn't approve of something.

How would she react if she found out her son is a homosexual insomniac, and has close to zero friends due to his bad boy façade? And, get this, what would she think if she knew he was proud to show it?

Scared? Shocked? Would she disown me? God, just thinking about it made me feel conflicted, restricted inside, and it sucked.

"Ah." She said, ending the conversation abruptly, gripping her coffee cup a little bit tighter, the edges of her mouth curling down in a frown. She knew I was hiding something, didn't she? But she didn't say anything. We stood there for a few moments in awkward silence. "Ty?" I've always hated when people call me that.

"Yeah?" I replied.

"What's the matter? Lately, you've been acting..." she hesitated, "well, strange. Everything okay? Does it have to do with Troye?"

I panicked, looking for any excuse to leave, trying to stay calm and collected. I saw the clock perched on the wall above the sink. "I'm great, couldn't be better," I lied. "but there's five minutes till I have to go on the bus Mom. Um, so I should go grab -" but before I could even finish the sentence, I was gone, running to my room, and closing the door behind me, locking it for good measure, sinking onto my knees. That was a pretty lame excuse. I never take the bus, I never have, and I never will. But what really hit close to home was him. Troye Sivan Mellet. The one kid that's ever been my friend, and the one kid that broke me and made me never want to have friends again.