Just Getting The Hang of It

Part VI

Now let's talk about the good ole' days. Throughout my life and especially these past five years I've had bad, even terrible and tragic times, days, moments. But I've experienced far more good, great, priceless ones. Through God's grace we gain such goodness from the worst of situations.

During hospital stays and even now after leaving Millers, Child Life, Music Therapy and Art Therapy were some of the good moments. Allison in the playroom always had something neat for me to do. Whether it was in the playroom or something to do in my room. She also gave me stuff like puzzles, board games and stuffed animals which I have a huge affinity for. Every teddy bear, stuffed animal, I own was given to me as a gift. All except one named "Bop". He's a stuffed penguin. I also own cow figures because well cattle are my favorite livestock animals. A girl can never have too many cows. Going back, Allison also kept me in mind when something came by the playroom. She never fails to surprise me, to this day when I go and visit. Thanks for everything Allison!

Now where do I begin with Carrie. Carrie was the art therapist at Millers up until this past year in 2017. She moved back to the East Coast. Philadelphia better take good care of her. Anyways, when I first started my treatment at Millers Carrie came into my room with art supplies. She introduced herself and asked if I wanted to do some art. She said it could be anything and while I painted, we talked and it was cathartic. I made sure I was always getting a chance to do it when she was around. Her along with a social worker named Tammie started an art therapy group. Through this group we met other kids on the unit or who were outpatient doing treatment. We expanded to seeing each other once a month, even when our treatment was over or in my case transferred. We learned to express ourselves, our journey and our illness through art while laughing along the way. Tammie is also no longer there and I wish her the best wherever she is.

Laurel is the music therapist at Millers. Now music is a very big thing to me. I learned to first read music and play an instrument in middle school. I love it. My first instrument was the flute. I taught myself piano and I'm not very good at it, but I'm in it for the experience. Laurel kept my practice up learning to play more music on the keyboard. She gave me my first keyboard so I could keep practicing at home. She also gave me a flute, when she found out mine was broken and bent. I owe her for keeping me entertained with the love of music that I hold deep in my soul from years of playing. For allowing that gift to continue at home and when I left Millers. Thanks Laurel, Carrie and Tammie. I also just want to say thank you to everyone at Millers. The nurses, the hemoc team, the nurse practitioners, the doctors and outpatient infusion. You all made my time at Millers Children's Hospital of Long Beach priceless. Love you all.

My Make-A-Wish. I chose to go to Venice, Italy. I wanted to do something my family could enjoy as well because my train of thought was that I wasn't the only one going through this. My family was as well. They had their fair share of taking me to treatment, clinic appointments, hospital stays. They were dealing with this in their own way. They had to watch me vomit, lose my hair, suffer from bad side effects of chemo, be tortured by insufferable muscle spasms and violent cramps, inject insulin because of steroids, lose friends, shed tears and later relapse. To watch and not be able to do a damn thing about it. I thought a break from that all would be nice. To Venice we went for a week. The city was beautiful and Make-A-Wish set us up on some cool tours. The venturing we did on our own was the best though. Thank you Make-A-Wish of Orange County and the Inland Empire for a trip that I would never again in my lifetime be able to do with my family.

Sunshine Kids was also a great experience. With them I went to New Orleans, Louisiana. It was a fun experience I made friends on that trip that I still keep up with through social media. The last big trip I took with them was actually here in California. I spent a week in Los Angeles and at that time that was actually new for me because although I live in Orange County and L.A is an hour out from us, I've never actually seen much of L.A. I got a tour of Beverly Hills and Hollywood. Went to the Griffith Observatory. I went to Universal Studios. All these were firsts for me. Despite at that time being 19. I got to experience Disneyland again after not experiencing it with my family since elementary school. I went to Paradise Cove in Malibu. The week was fantastic. We got to tour Warner Bros. Studio. Met the Cast of The Big Bang Theory. We also had a party at J.K Simmons' house. Most people know him best as J. Jonah Jameson from the first Spiderman trilogy with Tobey Maguire. Other things I did with the Sunshine Kids was eat at the Red O restaurant in L.A and watch a Clippers Vs Trail blazers game twice. Thanks for the experiences Sunshine Kids Foundation.

Now this last one I'll talk about is Camp Dream Street. I owe a lot of self recovery to this organization. When I was first diagnosed a girl in the playroom at Millers began to talk about an experience she had at summer camp for teens and young adults with life threatening illnesses. Intrigued I asked around about it and was put into contact with Teddi Softley. Another social worker at Millers. She helped me with the application and I can never express how life changing the decision to turn in this application turned out to be. I just want to thank Dr. Softley from the bottom of my heart for getting me there.

Dreem Street. Now I had the privilege to attend this camp twice, which isn't something that happens because there are so many other applicants who have never been to it. My first session was in July 2013. Here is where I met Emily, Meagan and Nicole. I also met some other wonderful people who I still keep up with in every which way I can. At camp not only did I make friends for a lifetime, I also learned how to heal my soul. With every story shared by someone, with every session and focus group, I learned to mend the emotional wounds cancer left me. Stories that inspired me, gave me courage, hope and self confidence. People who still instil confidence, hope and courage in me. I owe the world to Patty Grubman and the staff of both Dream Street and Canyon Ranch. To all my wonderful life long friends I made at Dream Street both 2013 and 2015, may we all continue to fight the good fight, whether that be illness or our own demons. May we all continue to stay safe and well.