why?//Emerson Barrett

girls/girls/boys//panic! at the disco

We are meeting with Palaye royale ya know to be trapped on tour with for ... what? 4 months ... great

The weird tension kinda dropped out of the air once Emerson started talking about his girlfriend ... and won't stop
People keep asking questions or telling story's except me and seb and I don't know if she doesn't like her or is just being a good friend

"What was y'alls most romantic date?" Lilly asked them obviously not caring that hey maybe this doesn't feels so great to me but I smile and sit back in the chair and listen in till some familiar words strike me "a fort in the living room with roses and all her favorite food and movies all night" ...that dick

*flashback*
Me and em are sitting in his living room after school just talking in till he asked me something "what is your, ideal date?"
He says with a smile on his lips right now we are probably 17

"Uh, I don't know ... just something small, like a fort! In the living room ,and a bunch of my food ,like pizza,and Snickers, and roses something small but sweet" I say with a smile imagining it he looks over at me with a wide smile and kisses me I kiss back "awe , that's cute" I hear from the door immediately knowing its Sebastian I pull away and look at him

"What?" I ask he sighs dramatically dreamlike "young love" he say in a higher voice with a hand over his heart I roll my eyes and leave Emerson and stand up "5 second start 1 2" I say to seb he widens his eyes and darts off u start running after him leaving Emerson laughing in the living room "

*flashback over*

That was one of the best days we spent together I kind smile at the memories but then realize he stole that and was a dick

I stand up grab my phone putting it in my pocket calmly because I don't want then to think I'm mad , even tho I am "hey! Where you going" miles asked while they all look up at me I was about to reply but then Sebastian stood up next to me and smiled I looked at him confused "where are you going ?" Remington asked "wherever she is going" he says smiling at me I smile back at him "well, I was gonna step out for a smoke" I say "you don't smoke?" Cherry says

I shake my head "I rarely smoke that's where your wrong" I say and turn to walk out seb walks out with me

We get outside I pick up a cigarette and my lighter and light one then remember seb and get a second one offering it to him as I put mine in my mouth he gladly takes it and I toss him the lighter
He catches it and does the same with his throwing it back to me as I put it in his back pocket me not having any

He looks at me with a smirk I shrug and he rolls his eyes with a laugh talking a drag i do the same

"Its good to have you back, bee" he says I smile at the old nickname "you too,seb" I say he looks at me and smiles taking a drag "I'm sorry" he says I look at him confused "what for?" I ask taking a drag
"Just, not keeping contact, being a bad friend all of it" he says sighing "seb, I don't blame you for that... at all okay?"
I put my cigarette out and stomp on it

I get the box out for another one because fuck it that's why, I get one and light it up "yeah,yeah but i-I don't know i just feel bad " seb says sighing "well, don't" I say and smile at him "so, your looking for the one" I say he looks at me with a smirk and rolls his eyes "you know I can't tell them, bee" he says with a sigh "yeah,yeah I know and I'm not gonna push you too, I know you will at your own timing ,all I'm saying is that I told them about ash and they are fine with it"he looks over to me with a blank expression "I know-I just I'm scared, I guess, and with you being gone I haven't really been able to talk to anyone about it and its just allot of bolt up emotion that I have been hiding " he says putting out his cigarette