Find My Way Home [m×m; mpreg]

twenty six

Three months and I still haven't seen Ian.  Sure, we talk and text, but even I know it's not enough.  Not for him or for me.

I'm almost five months along and I'm becoming restless and tired.

I want to see him.

I want to see Ian.

It's then that the door bell rings and my mom wipes his hands on his apron as he hurries to open the door.  I peer over the edge of the couch where I'm curled up.  My eyes widen, a small noise of surprise escaping my lips as I see who's standing in the doorway with a small smile.  Dark friendly eyes seeking mine over my mom's shoulder.

Jae.

Wait... Jae?

"Sorry to intrude," he apologizes profusely.

"It's fine," my mom assures, as he leads Jae deeper into our home.

I sit up straighter as can be, letting the warm throw blanket cover my swollen belly and hide it from sight.

"Something to drink?"

"No thank you," Jae declines politely.

My mom nods, slowly making his way back to the kitchen.  I watch him disappear around the corner and I almost panic. 

Why is Jae here? 

What the heck am I supposed to do?

"Uhh... hey," he smiles a bit timidly as he takes a proffered.

"Hi," I respond, voice tight with confusion seeping through.

We've texted after our brief [rather embarrassing] encounter during his birthday party when baby Grayson was conceived. 

However, our texts have never been too deep or probing.

A few simple "good mornings", "how are yous", and "what are you doings".  The most I know about him is that he's incredibly funny and kind.  We even share a few things in common, but other than that, I don't know much about him.

Like why he's here for example. 

"How are you?" He wonders.

"I um, I'm good.  You?"

"Good," he grins.

His simple smile makes me relax, makes me more comfortable in his presence.

We talk.

About anything and everything.

Random and silly.

We joke.

We play music and sing along to P!ATD.

And then... "hey, kids."

I groan, "mom!"

"Oh, hush," he smiles, "do me a favor and go to the store.  It's an emergency, I need some tomatoes.  Oh and some eggs and a gallon of milk as well. Take Mr. Handsome with you to help."

My cheeks flush at that, but it looks like I'm not the only one being embarrassed.

"I have my car out front, we can take it an-"

"Do you mind if we walk?" I interrupt shyly.

"I.. No, not at all."

"Awesome, I'll go get a sweater and we can get going," I say.

"Great, while you do that, do you mind if I use the bathroom?"

"It's down that hall, second door to the left," my mom calls out, as he scribbles out the actual list of groceries we'll need to pick up.

While Jae disappears, I quickly stand up and go in search of a hoodie that manages to hide my baby bump quite well.  I pat it a bit endearingly, rubbing my belly soothingly as the little tyke kicks my bladder.

When I finally reach downstairs, a bit winded, I look at my mom a bit questioningly.

"What?" He asks.

"Groceries?"

"Yeah," he nods, "thought it'd be good for you to stretch your leg."

"I... why now?  I've been grounded for three months and you're suddenly letting me out?"

"You were only grounded for a month and a half, the rest was self-imposed and you know it," he chuckles.

"But Ian-"

He sighs, pressing a kiss to my head as I pout, feeling tears well up in my eyes, "He's trying to give us the space to  figure things out.  And I know you think you're an adult because you're having a baby, but you're not.  You're still my responsibility, my little one."

"Ian won't hurt me.. not again," I whisper.

"I know.  But you have to understand that once trust is broken, it's really hard to gain it back.  And he's keeping his promise, he's keeping his distance and I respect him for it.  Just wait a bit more, please."

I don't have time to answer, to retort, or argue because Jae is back.

"Sorry, am I interrupting?"

"Not at all," my mom smiles, an unnoticeable twitch in his eye, "just giving Morgan a list, sorry if it expanded a bit."

I let my mom hug me before leaving, but the promise of fresh air after being cooped up makes me jittery and I leave without bothering to say goodbye.

Half way to the store, Jae tries to strike up a conversation.

"Walking, huh?"

"Yeah, I've been a bit grounded and I haven't gotten the opportunity to go out much," I sigh, shoving my hands in the packets of my hoodie and splaying my hands over the warm mound of my belly.

"You got grounded?  Was it that bad?"

"Kind of, yeah... it was pretty bad," I admit.

He puts his hands up in mock fear before I elbow his side, "I didn't kill anyone.  I just kind of lied in a bad way.  I became a disappointment."

His little teasing smile falls at that and he stops in his tracks, "I'm sure you're not a disappointment.  Your parents love you."

"I guess," I shrug, "but... It's hard to gain their trust back, I'm learning that now.  Once trust is broken... It's really broken."

"Again, that doesn't mean you're a disappointment.  I'm sure that soon everything will be alright between you.  They're starting to trust you again, right?  I mean they finally let you out," he points out.

"Only because I have a babysitter," I retort bitterly.

And I'm kind of tired of listening to false reassurances so I speed up, taking the park as a detour just to drag out the small trip to the store.

We drown in silence as we walk and my eyes stray to the little kids running through the park on more than one occasion, a little nudge from the inside reminding me of my own little wriggling trouble maker.

My phone vibrates in the pocket of my jeans and I slip it out to reveal a text message.

From: Bubba

To: Morgan

Friday, November 21, 2036

Hey, bambi.  Look up [2:09]

Confused, but too curious for my own good, I glance up.

And my heart nearly stops inside my chest when I see him.

Before I can even realize what I'm doing, I'm rushing into his opened arms, whispering a breathless, "Ian," against his broad chest.

"Hey there my little stumpy," he coos.

I can't even be mad at him for that stupid nickname, I can only feel the relief of having him in front of me and in my arms.

Still repeating his name like a prayer, "Ian."