Paralyzed [MTV's Scream]

0.06: breath in spontaneity

[ eastside - benny blanco ]
06 | THEY SHOULD ALL GO TO JAIL.

       exhaling heavily, i watched brooke, emma and will approach taking their seats besides us. "so, audrey you having fun tonight?" brooke questioned flicking some of her perfectly cut fringe away from her face, with an expectant tone.

       "um, yeah i guess." audrey stated blankly, swirling the red cup in her hands, "i just don't know why i'm at the memorial for someone who made my life miserable since like fourth grade." feeling slightly tense at her words i shuffled in my seat awkwardly.

       "no offence," the raven haired girl quickly shot back to me her eyes filled with sincerity, i nodded with a exasperated sigh.

"none taken, she hurt a lot of people i'm not going to paint her as an angel now just because she's dead," i slurred slowly in a constant blunt tone, swaying a little in my seat.

       letting the conversation about nina continue, i didn't really feel very much like talking, placing my empty cup on my knee i let out a breath before will's voice broke the silence. "yeah you know, maybe we're better off now she's gone."

       a look of shock crossed my face, as my lips parted in confusion, felling hurt by his words i stood up abruptly.

will squeezed the trigger bullets flying from his lips and falling into my heart, ricocheting through my ears i felt my worst fears bleed out onto the floor.

       "well that's my cue, i'm um, i'm gonna go get more," lifting up the empty cups in my hands i shook them, his words still piercing my skin with shards of glass.

with quivering lips and a shaking heart, my eyes were dark and deep enough with tears for someone to swim in.

       furrowing my brows, i stumbled from my seat tripping over the corner of my chair as i did so, noticing most people staring at me amused, i pushed past them hearing the hushed whispers, about tyler.

i felt like everything in my life had shattered and simultaneously been heightened, i was a shell of a person sadness seeping through my lips.

       feeling tears spring to my eyes, i closed my them, taking in a deep wobbly breath trying to steady myself.

attempting to place one foot in front of the other in the right order without falling, i stumbled back inside staggering over to the drinks table as more tears fell.

       "what are you looking at," i began fumbling over my words, whilst my shaky hands poured myself another cup of liquor from the cabinet.

emotions coursing through me like the hot tears crawling down my cheeks, with a heart burning in despair.

       "whoa, clam down there," caleb's sarcastic voice piped up from besides me, placing his hands delicately on my sides so i stopped swaying.

though my breathing was short and forced, i felt robbed of time the line between sanity and insanity becoming extremely thin.

       "they should all go to jail," i began wondering off on a tangent, my hands fiddling and wrapping my blonde locks around them giddily.

"jail?" caleb questioned, his eyebrows knitting together in confusion, though a hint of hilarity laced through his voice almost hidden by his smirk.

       "yeah, trust me. it's no fun." sniffling i began tumbling around the living area, chuckling to myself as i seemed to find humour in the simplest of things during my drunken haze.