Tired Lines; Soonhoon

02

☽

10:51 am.

"Jihoon, right?"

His voice is sort of melodic, but just a little rough. Like a silk ribbon with frayed edges. It's nice, it's really nice, and Jihoon is way too awake right now to handle it. It's okay when his brain is foggy, it's okay because then he doesn't really think about anything, things just are.

But being awake - the kind of awake that's like, I Just Woke Up, Brushed My Teeth And Had My Morning Coffee awake - Jihoon thinks too much. And that's not good, not in the least, because this boy is too cute for his own good and his voice maybe makes Jihoon feel a little woozy, and he's not sure he can stand making an idiot out of himself right now.

It's the same thing that's been happening every night since the first night Jihoon decided to start coming here - greet the barista, give him the order, and mutter thanks before going to pick someplace to sit, all while being insufferably flustered. Except tonight is different, and Jihoon's not sure why. Maybe it's the moon - that's what they do in the films, isn't it? Blame things on the moon? - or maybe Jihoon's just starting to lose it after so many weeks of going on the way he has been.

Whatever it is, he finds it in him to ask, "Hey, what's your name?" when he goes to grab his drink from the counter. He's beginning to question the legitimacy of chamomile's so-called 'healing' properties; Jihoon most definitely does not feel healed after so many nights spent drinking the stuff.

But that's not what he's thinking about right now, no, no - he's too distracted by the soft, soft smile that graces this boy's face, like, "Hey, what's your name?" is the kindest question he's ever been asked.

"Soonyoung," he says, and Jihoon absolutely does not have an explanation for the way his knees go weak at that.

And that's it.

2:39 am.

"Why don't you try lavender?" Jihoon's gone to order another cup of tea - who knew insomnia could be so pricey - but he freezes when Soonyoung speaks to him, dumbstruck upon hearing something other than, "Sure, anything else?" When he doesn't respond right away, the barista continues, "Lavender's also good for sleep, y'know, if chamomile's not working so well." After maybe five more seconds of Jihoon standing there silently, looking like a deer caught in headlights, he musters up some sort of response.

"Oh, yeah. Sure. Thanks."

He always did consider himself eloquent, huh.

4:58 am.

He's been staring at his notebook for the last fifteen minutes, now, trying his goddamn best to be somewhat productive despite feeling absolutely fried. His brain is caught in some awful state, somewhere in between 'I'm so tired I could pass out' and 'There's no way I'll be sleeping anytime soon,' and it isn't really setting the tone for work. He's still struggling to fish out something that vaguely resembles a decent song lyric when the question startles him -

"Are you still in school?"

He looks up, and he blanks. Soonyoung's eyes are warm, he notes, so much warmer than the lavender he'd had however many hours ago, and they're sending his conscious (or, what's left of it) into a frenzy. Jihoon was never one for eye contact - something about intimacy? - but this is so much worse, because Jihoon's also never really known how to act in situations like these, when the back of his neck is hot and his heart is lodged between his ribs, and he's panicking, panicking -

"Uh, yeah. I go to the university near here."

"Oh! What year are you?" Those eyes light up, and there's no way Jihoon's going to fall asleep within the next hour, not when he's hyper-focusing on everything about the boy in front of him. He can't think of anything else.

He clears his throat, murmuring, "My third," and hoping he doesn't sound too off-putting. His voice is too cold, too slowed down by lethargy, but Soonyoung's smile doesn't waver.

"Ah, I'm in my fourth, doing online classes. It's funny, I visit campus every now and then because I have friends who go there, but I've never seen you around."

Jihoon chooses not to mention the fact that he barely ever leaves his dorm, except to attend classes, and instead, he says, "I'm really hoping you find time to  otherwise you'd have to convince me that you're some sort of god who doesn't need sleep to function."

And maybe it comes out sounding really stupid, and maybe Jihoon cringes really hard as soon as the words leave his mouth - but Soonyoung laughs, so maybe it isn't that bad, right?

"I think you might have to do that, actually. Please tell me you don't attend regular classes when you're spending nearly every night in here, because I'm pretty sure that's not good for you." Jihoon's smile borders on bitter.

"Yeah, I don't think it is, either." And then Soonyoung frowns, and it isn't upset, exactly, but it makes Jihoon squirm with guilt nonetheless.

"Go home, get some rest," he says.

5:06 am.

The air is chilly on Jihoon's skin as he walks back to his dorm.