All Aboard

Part Thirteen

Barney

Barney watched the others laugh at Dan's story. He would have joined in if Dan's smug face wasn't annoying him so much. It was funny, but it wasn't that funny.

'Will you ever see her again?' asked Chloe.

Dan shook his head. 'Nope. No chance. I can never look her in the eye, ever again.'

Barney watched Mikaela put her hand on Dan's arm. Who was she trying to fool? This whole lesbian thing was obviously just a cry for attention.

'I feel so, so bad for you. You must have been mortified,' Mikaela said.

'I was. And you know sometimes when you drink so much that you have these gaping blank spots all over your night?'

'Uh huh.' Mikaela nodded and kept her eyes on Dan, but Barney knew she was thinking about him and their night together.

'Yeah; I didn't get that. The one night I would give anything to just wipe from my memory but I remember it all as clear as lemonade.' Dan looked at everyone else, even Barney. 'So, you've all heard mine. Anyone else care to share?'

God, thought Barney, I feel like I'm eleven years old on some stupid Scouts' camping trip.

'Come on! You can't seriously let me be the only one to humiliate myself?' Dan turned to Nav, who tried to shrink down in his seat, but he was so tall his hair was still peaking up from behind Chloe. 'Nav, dude, help me out here.'

Chloe

Chloe cringed on behalf of Nav, but was relieved that Dan hadn't picked on her instead.

'Sorry mate. No way,' Nav said.

'I know you must have something. Come on, man.' Dan pleaded.

Nav put his hands on the back of his head and smiled at Dan, then dropped them to his sides and pushed himself up. 'Fine.'

'Yes! I knew you'd have something,' beamed Dan.

'Can you all stop staring?' said Nav. 'Don't expect anything as good as Dan's.'

Dan stood up and bowed theatrically. 'You flatter me kind sir.'

'Okay. God, I can't believe I'm sharing this. It was awful at the time. I was at the swimming pool when I was about thirteen...'

Chloe cringed again. She wasn't sure she wanted to hear this.

Nav

Was Nav really about to tell his story in front of everyone? In front of Chloe? He'd got swept up in the camaraderie of it all and felt bad for Dan trying to lift everyone's spirits by himself. Dan's story had lightened the mood though. Hearing what a disaster Dan had with that girl make Nav feel slightly less pathetic himself.

'Oh shit, mate, I'd forgotten about this!' Dan laughed, slapping his leg.

'Were you there?' Nav groaned.

Dan nodded. 'Yeah, afraid so, mate.'

'Great,' said Nav, 'I don't need to say it then.'

'Yes you do!' said Mikaela. 'The rest of us weren't there.'

'Don't make me say it out loud, please,' said Nav, pulling his hands down his face. He puffed up his chest and smiled. 'I was thirteen and my thirteen year old thoughts were beyond my control. I was at the swimming pool. I was in swimming trunks. You can fill in the blanks.'

'Oh no. Really?' said Mikaela, her eyes wide.

'Really. It was a Saturday, and I dive bombed into the pool. The lifeguard shouted at me to get out and then started having a go at me. For some reason, that's when my brain decided it was a good idea to get aroused.'

'Was she hot?' Barney asked.

'Who?' said Nav, blinking at Barney.

'The lifeguard.'

Nav shrugged. 'He was okay, I guess.'

Barney inched forward in his seat, his eyebrows shooting up his forehead. 'You got a boner when you were talking to dude?'

'Yep,' nodded Nav. 'Look, it wasn't the guy I was talking to; it wasn't anything. It just happened. You know how it is.'

'Yeah, there's no stopping the python when it decides to come out of its tank,' Dan agreed, to a duet of groans from Mikaela and Chloe.

'Anyway, my junk was pretty much eye level for most of the kids running around the pool, so then the pointing and laughing started. I legged it to the changing rooms, but tripped over in the bit where you rinse your feet. My trunks came down so my arse was hanging out and I was face down in the water, and part of me thought it might be best to stay where I was and just drown of embarrassment. Then these two old white ladies with those swimming caps covered in flowers came and picked me up, and I pulled up my trunks while they marched me to first aid with a bloody nose and a raging hard on.'

Nav smiled at everyone. They were all shaking their heads but smiling, even Chloe. Maybe she felt bad for him, but at least that meant she felt something for him.