Rickian

Chapter 13

A/n

Ok I'm gonna continue with this story. Obviously, as I'm on chapter 13! But, I'm starting to feel like you guys don't like it anymore. All of you are soo sweet and you guys make me so HAPPY! But I can't help but feel like you don't want to read anymore. Enjoy this chapter!!

Trevor pov:

Ricky: Just drive.

He can't seriously be thinking what he's thinking. I mean, Kian's going to live. I'm so confused because Kian is always so happy, and now people are thinking he's tried to kill himself?! It just doesn't make any sense at all.

Trevor: Rick, I have a question.

We arrived at the house finally and we went in to sit I the couch.

Ricky: What?

Trevor: Why?

Ricky looks confused. I guess I did kind of just... say it.

Trevor: Like, did something happen between you guys? I'm really confused. Kian was so happy with you, and now people are telling me he tried to kill himself!

Ricky: I love him. I love him so fucking much, Trevor! And I told him I didn't love him. I made the worst mistake of my entire life! And now he could be dead! Everyone knows it's because of me! Everyone! Everyo-...

He's cut of by his own sobbing. He falls into my arms and I hug him. Soon, I feel his weight collapse against my shoulder, asleep. I leave him a note telling him I'll be at the hospital and to meet us there when he's ok.

Then, I drive.

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Ricky pov:

I wake up, feelin something on my forehead. I peel it off, and see that it's a note from Trevor, telling me he's at the hospital. I have a massive headache, because of the recent events. I think of Kian. He could be dead because of me.

I have to do it again.

I have to cut.

I slip into my bathroom that Kian and I shared. I find the razor that I've kept, just in case. I accidentally slice my thumb and my index finger in the process. I grip the sides of the counter. Do I really want to do this? Kian could die, of course I do! A life without Kian is not a life I want to live.

I hold the razor delicately, like it's my prized possession. In a way, it kind of is. I look down at the faded scars along my sides and my wrists. I put the razor to my skin, shaking slightly. I haven't done this is so long. I slide the sharp edge across my wrist. Only a light cut.

I continue to make them, almost all over my body. I make jagged ones on my sides. I make scratch-like ones on my thighs, and I make really deep ones on my wrists. All of them for Kian. Honestly, I probably cut deeper than i should've, considering I was beginning to feel queasy.

I fall to the floor, hitting my head on the edge of the shower. Hard.

I hear voices from downstairs. Shit. The boys are probably home by now, I forgot about them. I shut my eyes, and keep them shut. They're going to find me here. I hadn't even realized that I've been sobbing so loudly that they could probably hear me.

As if on que, the boys come running upstairs following the sound of the sobbing boy, drowning in his own sorrow. I open my eyes to hear the doorknob rattling.

Eventually, they find a key and open it with that. I still can't see clearly, but who I'm assuming is Jc comes running up to me. He picks me up, not minding the blood that will surely stain his clothing, and puts me in the backseat of the car. Here we go again.