His Mute Mate

Ch.49

Winter

We had one day a whole twenty four hours before everything went up in flames. To say today was going to hard was an understatement. Right now my best bet at getting through the day was to busy myself. If im doing something else chances are if im lucky I'll be able distract myself.

With that thought in mind I change into some work out clothes and make my way to the training room. Upon I entering I find that its completely empty. Everyone else was probably with their mate or training outside.

Quickly I wrap my hand so I don't hurt myself and get in the stance Max had taught me. Then in one fluid movement I thrust my hand into the black punching bag. I watched as the large bag went swinging back and fourth before I grabbed it. I landed anther hit enjoying the slight tingles that run through my hand at the contact.

Are you excited to see me pet. I know I've missed you.

I don't dare give him an answer and only slam my fist harder against the punching bag.

Come on why won't you talk to me pet. I thought we were friend, family even at one point.

My fist flies through the air once again somehow even harder then the last. I would put up a wall and block him but my concentration has been off since I woke up. My anxiety about tomorrow making my thoughts unclear. That was why I was here to try and center myself.

Are you just going to ignore me pet, that's not very nice. I guess I'll have punish you tomorrow.

The words send chills down my spin but I don't grant them a response. He'll get bored soon as long as I don't reply. Instead of giving him any type of response- that he'd know about- I take out my fear and frustration on the bag. Each punch harder the one before at some point the slight tingles morph into pain but I don't stop.

If you don't reply you're not gonna like your punishment.

With each word I punch harder, the sound and feeling of my hand slamming into the outer layer distraction me. Finally when I don't feel as anxious and stressed I focus on blocking my mind from everyone with Alex. It doesn't take long for me to so and I've gotten to the point that I can the wall and the absence of them in my head, even if they aren't speaking to me.

Though I've gotten some of my control back I still work with the punching bag. Letting it out through my punches was a lot better then alternative. Im sure future me will appreciate me not adding to work of art on my wrists and thighs. I could do without the weakening effects of the blood loss that comes with ripping my skin to shreds.

That seemed like the first thought would therapist would consider rational. Doctor Lauren would be so proud to know that successfully found a way to curve my urge to cut. I would be able to tell her our next Friday session as long as I make it through tomorrow.

Dean had insisted that kept going to therapy even if I stopped going to school because of the threat of a war. It was heart warming to know that he cared more about my mental health then going to school. Then again school hadn't really been doing anything but worsening it and I still did online classes when I found time.

I was concentrating so hard on beating up the bag that was keeping my mind and emotions from spilling out that I didn't notice anything around me. Forgetting your surroundings is bad enough but adding in a the fact that im easily scared, in a house full of friends that are making sure im ok, and a very protective and loving boyfriend, it can be pretty bad.

I don't notice the presence in the room until I feel the overwhelming sense of the dominate alphas and the wonderful tingles of my own alpha. Still I chose to just ignore them which was a bad idea from the start but who cares. Continuing on my cycle of punches changing fists with each swing like I didn't notice them.