Chapter 6

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I couldn't stop thinking of Tommy. I kind of got a better understanding of where he was coming from, but I definitely didn't feel any better about the situation.

I was 14 and in love with Tommy Conlon. I thought we would be together forever. Yeah, I know, how cliché of me. I knew he was the one. Mine. I just didn't take in the fact that his home life had gotten so bad that they would need to leave. I couldn't understand why Brendan stayed, and Tommy chose to leave. But I'm older now and I understand better. Even though I understand, doesn't make my heart hurt any less.

  That's why today I'm headed to the gym with Brendan in hopes that I can let go of all these frustrations. Brendan trains at his old gym with Frank Campana. We all go way back. I met him through Brendan, when Frank was training him in his pro days. Brendan thought it would be a good idea for me to get the hurt and frustrations out of my system, through a punching bag.

  While Brendan goes off to do his own thing, I'm left alone. I put in my earbuds and let the sounds of Rage Against the Machine's "Killing in The Name Of" take me into my own zone. I'm so lost in my own world that I don't notice how sweaty I am and that Frank has snuck up behind me.

"Move! Move or die!!" I jump. He's so loud I can hear him over my music. He's laughing as I turn towards him. I throw a punch and he's quick to block it.

"Asshole! Way to ruin a girl's concentration." He continues to laugh while offering me a fist bump.

"Figured I'd come save my punching bag from you. Why the brutal beating to my equipment?" He ask.

"Ok, first, aren't those what it's for? And second, why does anything need to be wrong?" I sass him as I put my fist on my hips.

He laughs again. "First off, too defensive and second, I know you Eliana. You throw you're best punches when something's bothering you."

"Besides the usual? All is good." He gives me a side eye, not buying anything I'm saying, but he drops it. I stand there looking around his gym, seeing people training or just getting a good workout. "So, who's Frank Campana's new rising star?"

  "Marco Santos. I'm training him for Sparta; he's a beast." He says enthusiastically.

  "Mmmhm, what exactly is Sparta?" I ask.

  "Only the best of the best MMA fighters compete in this tournament." I check out his prized fighter in the ring.

  "Well in that case where do I sign up?" I laugh.

"Aye, you can keep your hands and those cute little eyes to yourself, ok?" He warns playfully. "Gonna start tagging along with, Brendan? Let me know I could definitely add a female fighter to my roster."

  "Nah, I'm not into the idea of messing up this money maker." I say as I point to my face. Frank chuckles. "Just needed to let off some steam."

  "Knew something was bothering my little, Eliana. I'll let you get back to abusing my equipment. My prized fighter is done with his warm ups... now it's time for the real fun." While he runs off to the ring, I pop back in my ear buds and go to town on the punching bag until my arms feel like noodles.

On our way home I can feel Brendan's eyes on me. I sigh heavily. "What is it?" I ask.

"Did you get it out of your system?" He tries to ask nonchalantly, but I know the hidden question he's really trying to ask.

"By it do you mean Tommy?" I turn my head to the left to see his reaction. Just as expected, a wince. It hurts Brendan to talk about Tommy almost as much as it hurts me. I sigh heavily, already over this convo. "I'm pretty sure your brother left a scar that can never be repaired. I mean, don't you ever get tired of bringing up Tommy, Brendan?"

  Brendan nods absently. "It's just hard knowing my little brother is back and doesn't want to see me or even meet his nieces." He says solemnly. "Not to mention the fact that he's training with pop again..." Brendan trails off.

  "Yea... well it's no picnic living up the street from them either. This shit is just bringing me back to my 14 year old self with a crushed heart and stolen virginity." I can see Brendan wince from the corner of my eye. "I know, TMI or whatever, but if there's anyone that knows how it feels to see him again, Brendan, it's me." Only I can't bring myself to tell him that Tommy has tried a few times to communicate with me.

   We drive in silence the rest of the way to my house. The music on low while we both are probably wallowing in our thoughts.

As soon as I am in my house I take a long shower, followed by some reading to escape from my real life for a bit. After a bit, I watch TV until I can no longer keep my eyes open and the TV starts watching me.

I smell him as if he were lying right beside me. I can feel the heat radiating off his body. His touch... wait his touch!? My eyes open to find Tommy laying on his side with an expression I could not fathom. I say nothing, not that I can anyway in my state of shock. He brushes a loose strand of hair behind my ear. His fingers trail the nape of my neck. He moves closer until his face is inches away from mine.

  All I could do is stare at Tommy Conlon, once again in my bed. The look in his eyes is one I know too well. He's hurting, he's in pain and needs someone to talk to. Déjà Vu. I'm transported back to our teen years. The first time he had ever snuck into my room.

  "I need you, Eliana." His deep raspy voice brings me back to the present. I stare into those eyes I knew so well and could not deny the pain I saw in them. I couldn't bring myself to ask him to leave.

  So here I lie right next to Tommy, ready to be his safe haven again.

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