"Girls love girls and boys. And love is not a choice."
Oliver Spade wonders if this is how Pride is celebrated all across the United States of America. Is it just a colorful in New York? Is it just as loud in Chicago? Is it just as vibrant and exciting in San Francisco as it is in Washington D.C.?
He thinks it might be.
The summer sun is bright and happily shining on the top of his head. Blake sits beside him on the curb, laughing loudly at something Aliza says. Aliza's fathers sit on the other side of her, sharing a bag of candy they had purchased from a very eccentric, redheaded drag queen. Thousands upon thousands of people are crammed on the street as the parade continues to march.
Everyone looks so happy. Every which way Oliver looks, he sees a smile.
Decorated cars, lively floats, throngs of various supportive groups, bands, and street performers pass them by. FCKH8 and LEGALIZE GAY marriage shirts make him grin from ear to ear. A group of girls and boys traipse around doing backflips and frontflips and all kinds of flips. He sees men and women of all ages, all shapes and sizes and he sees children devouring massive ice cream cones. The Human Rights Campaign marches by with a massive flag. He even sees two grown, balding men in swim trunks having a water gun fight.
Oliver can also safely say that he's never seen so many men in spandex underwear, if one could even call it underwear.
He has also never seen so many men kissing men or women kissing women. He's never seen so many men holding hands. He's never seen so many carefree smiles in one place.
"Having fun?" Blake nearly has to shout to be heard over the upcoming marching band.
"Y'know," Oliver says. "I am."
"Good," Blake says, nudging Oliver's knee with his own.
Blushing as he ducks his head, Oliver glances up at Blake through his lashes and they share a secretive, coy smile.
It's all about smiles and, obviously, rainbows today.
"Oh, look, look!" Aliza squeals, smacking Blake on his shoulder to get his attention. "I told you they'd be here!"
Curious as to what she means, Oliver looks up to see where she's pointing.
He almost doesn't believe his eyes.
"I – what – what're they doing here?" he stutters.
"They're here for the same reason you are," one of Aliza's dads says. "To show support and to have fun."
Staring in disbelief, Oliver almost rubs his eyes as if he might be roused from a dream. There, plain as day, is a massive group marching behind a banner that reads "GAY UNDER GOD" in every color of the rainbow, framed by two crosses.
"But they – they're-"
"You're the one who told me that not all Christians are out to bash and condemn," Blake reminds him.
"Well yeah, but I just never expected – I mean-"
Oliver cuts himself off with a quick shake of his head. Unwillingly, tears begin to gather in the corners of his eyes but he wipes them away quickly. He never thought he'd see Christians march in a gay pride parade, never in a million, trillion years. Oliver had learned quite a bit over the past year and he had completely changed his way of thinking. However, he's sad to find that he's still so naïve on some fronts.
"March with them," Aliza urges.
"What – no, I can't-"
"Come on," Blake says, standing and offering his hand. "I'll go with you."
"We didn't even sign up or anything!" Oliver squeaks.
"They're not going to care," Aliza says. "Trust me."
"But-"
"Please," Blake says gently, hand still outstretched. "Just for a while."
Biting his lip, Oliver chances another look at the group behind the banner. Maybe it's the heat or maybe it's their smiling faces, but he places his hand in Blake's and allows himself to be tugged to his feet.
"Just for a little while," Oliver agrees.
They rush over to the group, Oliver more or less being dragged, and fall in line next to a kind looking woman with a baseball cap on. Her smile widens and she latches onto Blake's free hand as they continue to walk.
"Nice to have you with us, boys," she says. "Where are you two from?"
"We live in Arnold," Blake informs. "I hope it's okay that we're – I mean, I'm not very, um, religious, but my boyfriend is a Baptist."
The woman clicks her tongue. "Rough."
"Only sometimes," Blake says with a squeeze to Oliver's hand. "We make it work."
"Glad to hear it," she says with a strong elbow to Blake's ribs. "My son's one of the ones closer to the front of the parade dressed as Judy Garland. I have to say, he makes one fine woman."
"That was your son?" Blake asks in disbelief. "I could have sworn-"
"I know. The resemblance is outrageous."
"I'll say."
They laugh together and Oliver suppresses a chuckle. They pass by Aliza and her dads who all wave enthusiastically until Oliver gives a shy little wave of his fingers in return. A group of half naked men trot along beside them, all holding hands with their partners and sharing sweet, chaste kisses in front of the entire crowd. The sight makes Oliver's heart ache just a little bit.
He wishes he could be like that for Blake. Well, maybe not the half naked part. He's definitely not secure enough in himself to skip along in a rainbow set of spanky shorts.
Staring down at their entwined hands, Oliver slides a thumb over Blake's knuckle in a timid reflection of a public display of affection. The air around them is hot and thick with cheerful laughter and the scent of cotton candy from a nearby street vendor. The pride flags in every other person's hands become dizzying sights. All at once he feels out of place yet completely safe. He feels like he doesn't belong among such accepting, loving people but then he's never felt quite at home as he does among thousands of strangers who don't even know his name or his story. It's confusing, exciting, terrifying, and liberating all at the same time.
"You okay?" Blake asks as quietly as possible.
"Yeah," Oliver says quickly. "I'm fine."
"We can go back and sit if you-"
"No, I want to keep walking," Oliver tells him because he does, he really does.
Blake gives him a nod and they continue on their trek down the crowded street. With every few steps, Oliver becomes more at ease. They listen to the woman, Karen, as they had discovered, ramble on about her drama queen of a son for about a quarter of a mile until they catch a glimpse of something sad and completely uncalled for.
Near a stop sign, a group of seven or eight men and women hold various signs that completely demean the spirit of the parade.
"IF WE ALLOW GAY MARRIAGE, WE ALLOW CANNIBALISM, AND THE TERRORISTS WILL HAVE WON."
"HOMO SEX IS SIN" and "ASK ME WHY YOU DESERVE HELL"
"THREE GAY RIGHTS: AIDS, HELL, SALVATION"
Oliver stares, jaw nearly hitting the ground as Karen urges them to ignore the hate but for some reason, Oliver can't do that. Something snaps in him, something fierce and completely out of character. Conscience gone and self-preservation lost in his fury, Oliver drags Blake over to stand directly in front of the group with signs.
"Oliver, don't-"
"Three things!" Oliver shouts over the crowd and their bigoted rants. "One, if you're equating gay marriage with cannibalism and cannibalism with terrorism, you need a refresher course on metaphors or comparisons. Two, I don't have AIDS, my boyfriend doesn't have AIDS, and I can bet that the majority of those participating in this parade don't either. Get your facts straight. Three, you want me to ask why I deserve hell? Well guess what? I don't deserve hell. I deserve love. I deserve love and I deserve equal rights and I have the right to kiss this boy whenever I please."
With that, Oliver pulls Blake flush against him and plants a deep kiss on his lips in front of everyone who can see. He kisses him beneath the cheery sun, under a bundle of rainbow balloons, and he hears Karen cheering from her spot in the parade as he threads his fingers into Blake's hair. When he finally pulls back, they're both breathless and Blake looks completely dazed.
Oliver turns back to the group of sign holders.
"So stick that in your pipe and smoke it," he finishes before shooting them the bird and giving them all a wink.
He wraps an arm around Blake's waist, his free hand adjusting the simple, silver cross around his neck, and begins leading him back to Aliza and her dads. Finally coming back to himself, Blake blinks away his shock.
"You just-"
"Yeah," Oliver says. "I did."
"You flipped them off."
"Yup."
"You – you kissed me in front of-"
"There's a first time for everything."
"I'm so in love with you," Blake says in awe.
Oliver smiles, kisses Blake's cheek, and they continue to wander down the street back to their friends.
The summer's hot, it smells like candy, and everything, quite literally, is bright and gay.
YOU ARE READING
Sins of the Flesh
RomanceI'm sorry I am not made perfectly in your image. But maybe I wasn't supposed to be. --- He still prays every night. He still attends church every Sunday. He still believes. But he still cannot tell himself that he's gay. He can't write it. He ca...
