Hi there, if you're reading this you're probably one of my friends because who else would read this?? Anyways, I didn't want to openly post this on any of my social media because I feel you have to read the story to really understand how important this story is to me.
It's been sitting in the back of my head for the last month or so as I've been internally battling with the idea of religion, sexuality and beliefs in general. I was raised in a very religious household and went to church every Sunday. Sure I didn't grow up in a small southern town in Missouri like Oliver, but I was raised on the same morals I based him off of, maybe not as intense or oblivious, but in order for the story to unfold the way I needed it to, I needed to exaggerate him on that level. The way he went through his emotional hurdles was reminiscent of the ones I battled when I met the first girl I loved back in eighth grade and I remember how much I tried to deny my feelings and lie to myself and she was there like a beacon of light and she let me figure it out on my own.
On the other hand we have Blake. He is what I wanted to be in terms of being comfortable with myself. He represents my current views on religion and belief systems in general and I needed to have the two personalities battle it out in order to come to terms with the way I've been feeling recently. Blake was made to be my ideal persona, but humanized to be brute sometimes and he got bullied which is something I've never struggled with. He asked all the questions no one else ever thought of or wouldn't dream to ask purely because it was unmoral, but he questioned everything, just like I did growing up, maybe I wasn't as forward about it as he was, but It was a part of me to explore if I was more confident in my stance.
This little note probably means nothing to no one, but my mental state improved in just the last day while I wrote this down and I'm just incredibly impressed it came out of my head perfectly and in just the way I wanted it to. I think it came down to luck and a miracle that only happens in the movies.
--Abby
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Sins of the Flesh
RomanceI'm sorry I am not made perfectly in your image. But maybe I wasn't supposed to be. --- He still prays every night. He still attends church every Sunday. He still believes. But he still cannot tell himself that he's gay. He can't write it. He ca...
