shine || ptg hui x (g)idle soojin

II : puffy red eyes

back when i was little, my mom gave me three rules on how to be a good boy. one, 'always obey mom', two, 'be good to others' and lastly, 'always smile.'

now, i never follow any rules she gave me. back then i was a mother's boy, when everything is okay, but now, it will never be.

i went inside my room and jumped on my bed, laying down while staring at the ceiling. why did i became her son? does she still care for me and jieun? seems like we're not her child. i was deep in my thoughts when i heard a knock on my door, it must be jieun.

"come in." i said, this better not be mom.

the door opened and to my surprise, it was my sister, jieun. "hey, hui oppa."

"oh, hey jieun." i sat on my bed and tapped my hands on the side. she sat beside me while lowering her head. "what's the problem?" i asked, she seems anxious. jieun fidgeted her fingers and muttered something that i couldn't hear. my sister rarely talks, so it's a surprise that she came here to talk with me.

"what? i can't hear you." i said gently. my sister is a sensitive person that's why i'm always careful with my words.

"i said, my groupmates chose me to be their leader." she said, hesitant.

"thats' good!" i commented. my sister, jieun is a very smart and responsible girl, i know she can do it.

"no it's not." she whispered. "what if i fail to reach their expectations? what if im not good enough? i can't do this, i'm scared." she said and sobbed.

i immediately hugged her and carrassed her back. i know exactly how it feels like, afraid of being not enough to fulfill the responsibility given to you.

"jieun, listen to me carefully, okay? they wouldn't choose you as a leader if you're not capable of it. they've seen your potential thats why they chose you. so, dont be afraid and be brave. because everything happens for a reason and the reason is for you to fully trust yourself that you're capable in doing everything."

"you think?" she asked and raised her head.

i nodded and wiped her tears, " i may not be the best brother in the world but always remember that i will be here by your side to listen and help you."

"i object. you're the best brother in the world." she said and smiled.

"ya, dont make me flutter." i said jokingly and messed her hair. jieun laughed and shoved my hand away. "ugh! now may hair is literally a birds nest. thanks for the advice oppa, you're the best." she said and gave me a thumbs up before going out my room.

atleast i made her feel better, i couldn't even to that to myself. im such a hypocrite. i groaned and opened my loptop on the bedside table.

i checked if there were any emails in my inbox.

"still nothing." i shut and closed it down. its been weeks since they scouted me and told that i need to audition first, but they're still not giving me any response. maybe, they changed their mind and realized that im not worth scouting.

last month, i worked at a club as a part time singer, and some guy who claimed himself as a staff in cube wanted to scout me. he gave me his calling card and email saying that i should send him my audition piece via email anytime.

he also added that i'm not allowed to tell anyone about this. even my parents. i don't know why though.

my phone vibrated. i opened it to see who messaged me.

from: unknown number

hey dude i got your number

my eyebrows furrowed.

to: unknown number

who's this?

from: unknown number

it's hyojong. save my num.

to: unknown number

where did u get my num?

from: unknown number

school records. i sneaked into the office.

to: unknown number

idiot. you could've just asked me!

from: unknown number

no thrill dude.

i rolled my eyes and saved his number. this guy is a total idiot.

i heard someone knocking to my door. "hui? dinner's ready." its mom. i groaned and covered my face with a pillow. i don't have time for dinner since i have a lot of things to do. i didn't answered her and opened my backpack to get my notebooks and reviewers. i went to my study table and of course, studied.

**

i felt stiffness on my neck as i woke up. argh. i didn't noticed that i slept on my table. i fixed my things and put them inside my bag.i grabbed my towel and went to the bathroom. i smell terrible already.

after taking a bath i went downstairs and realized that mom wasn't here anymore. to what she usually do. leaving us behind. i saw jieun on the kitchen and she's cooking some breakfast. good thing that jieun is here.

"oppa, you're already awake?"

"isn't it obvious already?"

"ya oppa!"

"i was just joking you." i said and laughed. "come here." i opened my arms wide, expecting a hug. she pouted her lips like a small cute girl. i laughed which made her expression change.

"what's so funny?" she asked while pouting again and her arms crossed. besides of her facial expression, wearing an apron makes her cute more.

"nothing. just give hui oppa a hug. just one." i said and she finally hugged me. i missed hugging this little girl. i can still remember her playing toy cars instead of barbie dolls but she didn't grow up like a boyish person.

"what's for breakfast?" i asked and ruffled her hair. i picked my shoes and wore it on. i saw she placed a 2 bowls of kimchi rice. it's nice that jieun can cook simple dishes like this. i can't trust anyone except dad and her.

"good luck! fighting! you can do it, trust on your groupmates and don't forget to trust on yourself." i adviced jieun after eating. i brushed my teeth and wore my bag. she closed the door and i bid goodbye to her.

**

i made my way to my room.i was a bit early because it's just me and a girl here. she was sitting near the window and staring at the blue sky. but her body proportions and hair color seems familiar.

i squinted my eyes to get a good look at her but i slipped so she turned her head. oh. its the bimbo girl, soojin.

she glared and rolled her eyes at me and continued staring outside the window. what is her problem?

i just sat on my chair and ignored her. but i couldn't deny the fact that she glared at me with her puffy red eyes.