shine || ptg hui x (g)idle soojin

VIII : her name

they said being a trainee isn't easy in the first place.going to the company everyday,spending 14 hours of training plus if you're a student.there are a lot of trainees with long training years but still,they haven't debuted in a group.i feel bad for them,almost spending half of their life on training but can't still achieve their dreams.

being a trainee,you need patience and hardwork all time and you have to give your best every time.when i auditioned and jyp entertainment 4 years ago,i didn't exepect that i would win in their open audition.and i didn't expect to meet a new friend,minseok or better known as xiumin of exo.he was undeniably cute that time because of his chubby cheeks but now,he turned into a more mature man.maybe he was destined to debut in a well known group in the world.

while i was training for 2 years in jyp,a problem arose in our family.dad once saw mom hanging out with an unknwon guy.at first i can't believe that mom would do that to us but one day,i followed mom and i saw it with my own eyes.they were holding each other's hands in the park and that day,i lost my respect to my mom.in order to for dad to move on from that,he found a job in america and started working there.

when mom decided to go home one day,she realized that dad wasn't there anymore----only me and jieun.she didn't hesitate to ask any question and grabbed a large luggage with all of her clothes there and left us without any word.is that what you can call a mother?aren't we enough?she should've told us earlier to lessen the pain.

at that time,jieun was more important that my dreams.i gave up being a trainee so i can look after her.she was 19 that time and i can't leave her in a situation like that.in order for me to move on from what happened to our family,i spent countless nights on clubs------doing part time work and sometimes singing.i can't rely everything on dad.i also have to work for myself and for jieun.

i found myself smiling while walking in the alley.i still can't believe that i am now an official trainee of cube ent.my wrist watch sounded and it's already 2pm.i have to go home and tell jieun about this so we can move to the dorm provided by the company tommorow.

i looked for my phone again,it's july 23,it's jieun's birthday.thanks goodness i remembered.i decided to stop over on a mart and bought some ingredients so i can cook for her at home.i also brought some balloons and party needs,it's childish but i'll do everything to make jieun happy for her special day.there was one thing that keeps bothering my mind but i can't remember it.ah!k have to buy cake for her.while at the alley,i saw a pastry shop nearby.jieun likes sweets like chocolates so i chose a black forest cake for her.

"uh miss,how much is this?"

"10$,sir,"

"okay,i'll take this,"

i payed at the cashier ans went out of the store.i took a glance again at my wrist watch and it's already 4pm means i spent 2 hours in grocery.i remembered that jieun said she will be going home late because they have a project to do at their friend's house.

what a perfect timing.

as i arrived the house,i started to decorate the house with balloons and crepe papers.i looked for our old christmas lights and also decided to add it as s decoration.it was 5 pm when i finished decorating and i started cooking.i only have 2 hours left so i have to be in a hurry.

my first dish to cook is carbonara because she's really obsessed in it.i let the pasta boil in the water until it gets soft and strained it's water.for the sauce,i had evaporada,mushrooms and tuna flakes.i fried the onion and garlic first and added the tuna flakes,then evaporada and mushrooms.i poured it on top on the pasta and sprinkled some parsleys in it.

next is galbi,i marinated th beef for 45 minutes and sort of grilled it.i sliced some white onions and put them on top of it.aside from galbi,i also prepared samgyupsal that jieun likes.i also bought hotdogs,fried them and sticked it on a stick with marshmallows.i also cooked some western foods that i know so jieun can taste it too.i looked at the wall clock,it's 6:45 pm and i sniffed myself,my full body smells bad because of sweat.

i went to the bathroom and took a quick shower.when i reached my room,i remembered the tshirt that jieun gave me on my last birthday so i was planning to wear it today.5 minutes was left,i rushed down and turned off the lights.immediately,i recieved a text from jieun that she's already near.when i heard that the door opened,i tried my best not to make a noise.i hid beside the cabinet near the door.and there was jieun,clueless why the whole house was dark.

"h-hui oppa,i'm h-home," she said uttering,before she reached out for the switch i plugged that christmas lights which made the whole house bright.

i held the cake and sang, "happy birthday to you~happy birthday to you~happy birthday~happy birthday~happy birthday jieun,"

she seems surprised that she forgot that it's her birthday today.i noticed something that she was holding,it was a paper bag but i don't know what's inside,i'll just gonna ask her later.for now,she have to make her wishes and blow that candles.

"o-oppa," she sobs.

"shh," i caressed her back with my right hand while my left hand is holding the cake. "just make a wish and blow this candle."

she closed her eyes for a while and blew the candle.she really seems very happy just like what i am expecting to.i want her to feel that she's special,she's important,she's irreplaceable,she's responsible in everything.

we went in the table and she's surprised that there's a lot of food,plus i bought her favorite cake.before we started eating,i placed a party hat on her head that made her chuckle a bit.it's not childish!

"ya,what is this?" she asked asked reached out for the party hat. "party hat,of course."

"isn't this too childish?i mean----,"

i pouted.

"ya,don't pout,you look like a duck,"

i pouted again,teasingly.

"eh,stop with your pouting sessions let's just eat.i'm already hungry," she said and i began to eat also.her schoolmates(even though they're not close) also greeted her,in personal and even in social media.some of her so called friends,treated her and gave her some gifts.i am so thankful for them for remembering my sister's special day.

while we are eating,i noticed something that's sparkling on her neck.it's a necklace and it's seems real because it's sparkling even it's kind of dim here.

"jieun," i said while chewing the beef. "who gave you that?" i asked pointing the necklace.

"ah,while i was on my way going home,a girl asked me if i am your sister then i said yes.she said that you're her classmate so she gave me this."

"what's her name?"

she paused.she took a sip from the juice and said,

"soojin,seo soojin,"

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BOOM!

i will update again on tuesday or wednesday,thanks to sem break.