To Be A Killer

Chapter 67: Welcome Home (Sanitarium)

"Runner Five, head over to the gates," Sam says, and I obey immediately. "Isabel's gonna be here any second and she says the Ministry wants to keep this all exactly to time. Actually, I think she's just hoping to have time to search that lighthouse for more Jimmy's Jaunts memorabilia-which, you know, I totally approve of."

I laugh. "Maybe I can grab something for the kids too."

I've already gotten Milo and Penelope a few trivial gifts, like pencils and small coloring books, but I've not gotten them anything that I can honestly say is a great gift. And I've only gotten Sam a few small blankets, since the one he uses when he sleeps in the coms shack is absolute shit.

"Maybe. But yeah, this is a follow up to those 'look me in the eyes. You are getting very sleepy' sessions you had with Isabel yesterday. The Ministry scanned Maxine's brain, and although we're not going to be able to build a replica of that machine at the Tavington Clinic-I mean, that's out of the question for now, at least-but they reckon they can really reproduce the same effects by hypnosis.

"It's worth a try, anyway. Janine says it sounds like a bunch of cobbles to her, but you know, she's taking a few days off to process the fact that her brother's still alive and is totally mental, and totally wants to kill her. I mean, you know how she is. She hasn't said anything to me, and we haven't managed to find him. All she says was, 'Well, Mr. Yao, with his training, you'd hardly expect to find him, and better not to look.'" He pauses. "I didn't know what to say to that, to be honest."

"Do you really think this will work?" I ask. "Do you really think this will let me change what I've seen?"

"I... Well, Five, I-"

I hear a door open through my headset. "Hello. Anybody home?"

"Oh! Isabel, uh, come on in. I was just, um, I was just briefing Runner Five."

"Excellent," She replies, and I shift uncomfortably, really wanting to have heard Sam's answer. "Now, Five, we played the hypnotic suggestions in our session yesterday. So if this works today, you'll be fully immune to mind control. We need to complete the process in a familiar environment, somewhere you'll feel at ease, so you'll be running."

"There's no actual, like, mission," Sam cuts in, "and just to make sure you're extra safe, we've made an exception to the rule, and you've got the ZRD in your backpack. No zombies; No hassle. So all you have to think about is, um, I don't know-whatever Isabel wants you to think about, or not think about. How does this work again?"

"Yes, thank you, Sam," She replies curtly, and my shoulders tense at her tone. I don't like how she said that to him. "Right, Five. I think we're ready to go."

"Yeah, I guess we are," I reply, my voice flat.

"Good. Raise the gates! Now, all you need to do is run the route we discussed at a nice, easy pace. Ready? And run."

I obey, heart rate quickening in anxiety as I wonder if this will actually work. What if this fails? What if this is simply a waste of our time-my time? What if this is simply false hope that I can be made immune?

And if it does work? What if I do become immune to mind control? How will this change my fate? Will it change my visions of me dying? Will it seal that fate by me avoiding this one?

I hate not knowing. I hate having to guess and wonder. I hate all of it.

But there's nothing I can do about it now. Right now I have to keep going, keep moving forward and keep trying to make sure the people I love stay safe. That's all I can do.

I sniffle, cold sweat beginning to run down my face. The weather is as chilly as ever, which isn't surprising since it is December. I just hate how the cold still effects me, even if it can't make me sick. My lips still chap and my eyes still water, and my teeth still chatter as the cold air gives my body no mercy.