To Be A Killer

Chapter 16: The Man Who Sold The World

"Hold up, Five! My superb fitness levels have fallen a bit recently," Simon yells before forcing out a laugh. "Funny that. Never would've imagined getting beaten half to death would've had a negative effect on my stamina."

"Leave me alone!" I scream, running as fast as possible to get away from him. I can't think properly. It's taking everything in me to remember how to breathe correctly.

It's him. It's Simon. He's alive. Oh, God, he's alive.

I can't look at him. I don't want to. All I want is to get as far away from him as possible. That dream I had can go suck it for all I care. I can't be around him, not after what he's done. I cannot-I will not-let him back in.

"It is me, you know-your old mucker, Simon," He says. Anger boils my blood, and hurt floods my veins. How dare he act as if this is a meeting between old friends! How dare he! "I would take the mask off, only I don't think you'd wanna see what's underneath. There's enough nightmare fuel for everyone these days as it is, isn't it? No need to give you any extra."

I can't look back at him. Seeing him in this condition... I can't look at him because if I do, I'll feel... I'll feel sorry for him.

What the hell is wrong with me?

I know I will though. After the initial shock wore off a bit-I still am pretty shocked-I finally realized the condition he was in. I finally realized this was my friend who was in this condition and I sympathized for him, as if he didn't deserve what happened to him.

But he did. He deserved it all. He deserved to die...

So why do I feel slightly happy knowing he's alive?

That's how I know I can't look back at him. For some reason, I can't stay angry at him, not while he's here. It was the same way with Katelyn and Anna. If I would've stayed at the AMTB, I would've forgiven her.

They're my weakness.

I can't let myself forgive him that easily... no matter what my dream said.

"For God's sake, Five," Simon laughs. "Stop running away. I've been tryin' to get you alone for weeks. I've got some intel you're gonna find very interesting about a certain someone. I'll give you a clue: rhymes with Pan Dark."

I keep running.

"Five, I'm not kidding... Never mind that now. Just listen to me. You're going the wrong way. You can't hear Sam because the Deadlocks have got a signal blocker, and you're runnin' slap bang into an ambush. You need to turn left. Left!"

I go right. I can't trust him... not anymore.

"Fine. Suit yourself. Don't say I didn't warn ya."

I don't listen to him. I just keep running, letting out a sigh of relief when I no longer hear him calling out to me.

Now I understand why I was so angry in my dream. I understand why I was so upset. I think I know why I didn't recognize him  in my dream too. Because if I did, I wouldn't have come in the first place.

We'll have to find that base another way. I'm not going to accept any help from him, no matter what my vision says. He's a liar and a traitor who I cannot trust, and I know if I go with him, I'll let my guard down; I'll listen to what he has to say because for some reason I still care about him... a lot.

And if he sees that, he'll use it to his advantage, just as he has with everything else.

I tap my mic. "Sam? Sam, can you hear me? Sam, please come in."

I take a look around, no longer having that sense of familiarity with this place. I have no idea where I am or how to get out of here. I'm lost and alone.