WHY MEEEE????

Twenty-three

Farhaan.

"Because I love you, I love you Maryam." I yelled then  froze when i  realised what I said. Anger or regret, I don't know. She pushed me to the wall. I never planned on saying those words to her. She's too stubborn. And now that I've blurted something am not supposed to say to her, a married woman for that matter. I just betrayed ibrahim, he doesn't love her, but he will surely feel somehow.

I looked up and saw her face, looking at me with a blank expression. I quickly said "Am sorry uh uh" I scratched my head not knowing the right word to use. "am just sorry okay. That's not what you think." I quickly added and ran out of the house.

I never planned on telling her, not even now or ever. But I guess destiny knows how to play it's game..........

Two weeks later.

Maryam.

This life is just like a school, you'll be tested and challenged as you go. The higher you go, the tougher it becomes.

Ever since Farhaan confessed his love for me, everything changed completely. Ibrahim went back to his old self and routine. He mostly brought Anisa with him which affects me but there is nothing I can do about it.. Farhaan never called nor texted. He is the only one that cheers me up,  and I messed that up.

Kudos to me

Fatima is still disturbed about her ill mother. I distanced myself away from Hajara and Bilkisu for some reasons I don't know myself. I guess I just needed space.

Zahra went back to Australia with her husband and little sameera(ummee's namesake). I avoided the twins because they will surely ask question on my strained relationship with Farhaan.

Worst of all, Jamal, yes Jamal Muhammad showed up on my door step yesterday leaving me with just. "dig on your husband's past before you fall in love." what in the name of Sherlock hormes does that mean? And how did he know my husband or his past or the fact that am in love with him? and how on earth did he know where I live?

I couldn't sleep a wink yesterday. All I could think of was what Jamal said.

I made up my mind to go and search his study. Maybe I can find some clues.

I went to his study. As usual, It is dark and scattered. I opened the cottons and on the light.

The fast thing that caught my eye is his dairy that laid neatly on his gigantic table.

I was about to open the dairy when some papers fell. I kneeled down and packed the papers.

I started reading the papers. Most of them are medical reports so I didn't bother to read them. But this last one is different. I started opening it when I heard someone turning the door knob. I immediately threw the dairy and hide the paper at my back waiting for the person to come in.

"what the f**k are you doing here??" came my husband's caring voice. Note the sarcasm.

I scratched my head not knowing the excuse to give him.

Oh Maryam, you're doom.

"I....uh..uh..." I tried to say something but nothing came out. I wasn't even thinking straight.

Stupid stupid brain!

"Get out!" He backed. Way to go Ibrahim.

I stood there, looking at him like a lost puppy.

He gritted his teeth. "I. Said. Get. Out." He roared.