The Ocean Wanted A Kiss

Chapter three

My walk back home isn't lonely like the last time I left Andrew's house. My favorite bag of cheetos accompanies me along my fifteen minutes walk back home. You know that feeling when you're just relieved for getting back on someone who had broken you several times and shattered your heart into pieces? It feels so damn good, seeing him terrified from the idea of having a baby made me feel happy, like ahh finallyyy.

The world was like smiling at me again but it has just stopped as soon as I stepped into my house.

"You have a visitor," My mom informs me as long as I enter home through the front door. "Upstairs." She adds. I rush upstairs to my room as I wonder who would visit me at ten pm and for me specifically.

Oh crap.

"What you doin' here?" I ask the blond guy who claimed to save me from drowning myself to death, and also the asshole who thought I was kidding when I told him I was killing myself.

"People say hi when they firstly meet someone." He stands up from his seat. He's wearing a plain white hoodie and a pair of dark jeans, his hair is messier than I have seen yesterday.

"Oh but people don't say hi when they firstly meet an asshole." I scoff, raising my eyebrows in sarcasm. He gives me a dead glare before running his fingers through his muffled hair, accompanied with an eye roll. "Chill dude." I add as I sit on my bed and untied my sneakers before getting them off.

Still don't know what brings him here.

"How was your first day in school?" He asks me as he sits back in the chair that was straight across my bed. No one asked me that question today, I think. That question stops me in my tracks, just to fix my gaze on him for a moment and the smile is soon implanted on my face. No one has cared enough to ask me, this may sound childish but little things, yeah little things. They either can make you fly above the clouds from happiness or can dig you a hole beneath the ground to cry yourself out. I forget to answer the question as I stare blankly, thinking. "Is that question so hard to be answered?" He draws my attention back as he smirks at me.

"Nah just got a little distracted... But yeah today was alright, you know? Nothing special." I mutter combing my hair into a high pony tail. He nods at me and an uneasy blanket of silence gets wrapped around us.

Before I break the silence by a direct question, "What brought you here?"

"I just couldn't stop thinking about what happened yesterday," He responds, fixing us in a serious gaze. "Whatever, I just wanted to apologize..." He says.

"Oh for being an asshole?" I scoff.

"Maybe."

"No don't worry about it, I deal with assholes often," I brush it off but he just glares at me that I think he's burning a hole in my head. "Alright, alright, tell me what's up."

"I wanted to apologize for acting like an asshole, I was just shocked to see someone attempting sui-"

"And here you go again, acting like an asshole." I roll my eyes and place my head between my palms.

"Oh damn girl, you gotta face the truth, you tried to kill yourself, yeah I might be an asshole but I saved you and you owe me much." His voice begins to rise up and all I did is running his way and placing my hand above his mouth to shut him up.

I know I may be stupid for attempting suicide but no one can really understand how it feels like to be depressed. For me, depression feels like living in a room with no windows or furniture. Just a door with someone on the other-side talking to me. Some days they can be cruel talk me down to the point I feel numb. Sometimes they'll be quiet and I won't hear them at all. The door never opens until it's bad and I let them in to eat me alive. I assume yesterday that door was wildly opened. And the worst part? That voice belongs to me.