LGBT Stories of Wattpad

Roz's Update

Hello everyone! Long time no see! Sorry! I kinda went on a BIG hiatus from Wattpad and now have a whole new account.  Roz (RoztheRobin) here! You probably know me as Roslyn, but I have changed my name and it is now Roz so there's that for ya. A lot more has changed since my first spot here in this book so I have decided to do this again, interview style, just like everyone else. 

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What do you identify as (gender, sexuality, romatic etc, etc)?:

I am queer and gender queer/gender flux

Do you mind explaining what those terms mean for those in our audience who might not understand?:

Queer is an umbrella term for everyone who is attracted to their same gender. I use it because my sexuality is so fluid that I don't even want to bother with trying to keep up. Gender queer is a term used by people who know they aren't cis, but aren't quite sure what they are. Gender flux is like an intensity knob. Sometimes I'm hyper feminine and feel 100% a girl, but others I don't feel like I have a gender at all. 

Did/do you ever struggle with accepting yourself? If yes, why?:

I do have a rough time accepting myself sometimes because sometimes even though I know I'm not straight and I know I'm not cis, I feel like I'm invading the space. I didn't really have a rough childhood and I was never bullied for being different.  I didn't ever have the issue of "being attracted to girls is bad and I shouldn't be." Which is great for me, I'm not complaining. The question asks why and that is my reason. It's also not something I've "always known" which also seems like a common theme in "real" queer people. I feel like I need like a gay fairy to come and tell me that I'm queer so my brain gets sorted out. 

Have you come out of the closet to your family? If so, how did they react?:

Like I mentioned in the previous section, I came out to my little sisters first as pansexual. One walking home from school, who was very accepting and the other at the kitchen table. She was not very accepting. In fact, she gave me a dirty look. I think this is where the distance between us started. 

A while after that, the unaccepting sister decided to tell my mom and step dad that I was pan.  My mom didn't react right away. It was the months that followed that really showed that she didn't believe me/didn't like the idea. I'm not going into the details. My step dad had the opposite reaction. He seemed to hate it right away and made it clear he thought I was a "special snowflake" but later backed off and now acts like it's no big deal. 

I have also tried to tell my mom about being gender queer, but I didn't get to that before she shot me down. I'd rather not go into the details. The whole situation was really hard on me and I'm still working through everything it was. Maybe someday I'll share, but I can't guarantee that. 

The same sister who outed me to my mom and step dad also told my dad. This is the positive coming out that I was waiting for. The coming out that I needed. How she did it was by telling him I was texting my girlfriend (a person, by the way, I do not have). He didn't even blink at the word girlfriend before he jumped right into asking about her and making it clear that the fact that I was dating a girl was 100% ok.  

What advice would you give other member of LGBT who may be closeted or struggling to accept themselves?:

The situation you are currently in will not be your forever. If you can't come out because your family would kick you out, that is fine. Coming out to your family isn't something anyone is obliged to do and if you cannot do it for safety reasons, your safety comes first. While it is great to be accepted right away, some people aren't and they lose their homes, friends, and family because of it. Some day you will move out. Someday you will find friends and a chosen family who will love you unconditionally, no matter how your blood family did/would react to the fact that you are LGBTQIA+. 

Life will get better. You just have to fight through the pain to get there. 

•••

I'm not going to go into the details about why I went on hiatus, but just know that I did and I'm back. For now, we'll see where the year takes me.  

Like always, if you would like YOUR story to be included into this book, just leave a comment and we will get to you as soon as we can. If you need someone to talk to about ANYTHING our inbox is always open, I have my personal account ( @RoztheRobin ), I have Tumblr (roztherobin), and a Twitter (roztherobin). The last two will be more active, but I will try to get to Wattpad as much as possible. 

~Roz~