Kim Wonpil // Clueless

9 ||

•° ✿ °•

"Wonpil, play me a song?"

The said boy glances at Chaemin who sat on her bed with her legs crossed, wearing a plain white shirt and a pair of jeans. She had her hair up in a bun and her face was free of make-up, but Wonpil still finds her beautiful without it. Her eyes sparkled and her face glowed. Wonpil loves that look on her.

"What song do you want?" He chuckles, moving towards the piano.

"How about you play me one of your songs?" She asks, flopping on her stomach with her elbows propped and palms on her cheeks.

Wonpil nods. His long and slender fingers hover over the black and white piano keys. He takes a deep breath before gently pressing the keys. Out came a soothing tune, one that made Chaemin's heart beat a ton faster. Wonpil smiles softly before singing along to the song.

♩

But today, I smile

Even though it hurts, I smile

In front of you

I pretend that I'm fine

I pretend that I'm okay

I have to

I smile

♩

Wonpil couldn't move after the last note. His body felt like trembling the more he thought of the song. The more he thought of someone. You, to be exact. Chaemin notices her boyfriend's sudden change of expression. She has a bad feeling in her gut. Her mind was in a constant debate whether to brave a question or force silence.

"Wonpil?" The girl gulps.

The boy hums softly in response, refusing to meet her eyes.

"Everything okay?" She asks, inching closer to him.

The boy hums softly in response, refusing to meet her eyes.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She gently cups his cheeks, turning to face them in her direction.

The boy shakes his head, hesitantly glancing her way.

"Are you sure?" The more he resisted to talk, the more anxious she got.

The boy shakes his head, hesitantly glancing her way.

Then, the words slip out of her mouth too suddenly.

"You love me, right?"

Silence. Wonpil's mouth remain zipped. Chaemin's mouth remain parted.

Why couldn't he force a simple 'yes' to leave his lips? Why couldn't he find the courage to look Chaemin in the eyes and tell her how he really felt? Why couldn't he?

He knows the answer, but he denies it.

With tears escaping the girl's eyes, she leaves the space next to him. Wonpil could finally breathe again, the unconscious contraction in his lungs has seemingly faded away. However, his heart started to shatter the more she stepped away from him. The more tears flowed from what used to be bright and cheerful eyes. It pained to know he was the cause of it.

Without him knowing, his right hand reaches out to her. She was a fingertip away from his touch. However, the girl stands still. Neither did she move away nor did she step closer to him. Wonpil's throat started to hurt as he choked back a sob.

"Chaemin..." He whispers softly.

"What do I do, Wonpil?" The girl chuckles lightly, water still staining her cheeks.

He didn't know what to say.

"If I step back, it'll mean letting you go... I don't want that." 

He listens.

"But if I step closer, it'll mean staying with you... but you're unhappy."

His heart hurt at that.

She was right.

"What do you want me to do?" She cries.

Chaemin looks straight into his eyes. He didn't want to meet her pained gaze, but he did. He couldn't look away. He was nervous. He was hurt. He was scared.

Finally, he opens his mouth.

"...I don't know anymore, Chaemin." 

°•. ✿ .•°