Rants of a teenage girl and her life

Fair Week

so this passed week was so amazing at the fair for the most part, I loved showing my 4-H animals again, but most of all I love working and hanging out at the Jr. Leaders foodstand. that's where most of my 4-H friends are anyways, because I don't go to school with any of them. but for the past few years I have had a crush on a few guys, they are all pretty cute if you ask me. but most of them are friends also with my brother and that is a little weird to want to date a friend of your brothers. but the last night of fair I got to go to a party afterwards and let's say some were not making the best decisions, but neither was I, first off I am saving myself for marriage which all of my friends and exes and future boyfriends all should know and secondly I don't do drugs, never have I honestly never will. but anyways I wasn't invited til that night by said crush and then he invited me to his party this weekend, he is a flirt to certain girls that he likes, so hopefully maybe he does like me. the other one is pretty much first crushes bff, which is not good, but then he is a dirty minded freak on certain occasions which I can live with because I make a dirty comment right back to him, and his cousin tried setting us up for a concert last week, I didn't mind till his other cousin asked me really loudly if I liked him. I denied it right away because he was on the other end of the phone.

we all hangout behind the foodstand because of the shade and there are some things that you can never forget, but some of the people that hangout back there as well. past Jr leaders or some that are older, me, and then the beginners that just don't know what to do.

but the one thing I don't like, and God forbid they see this, but when you have a friend that sits back there, when you are working a shift in the stand, all by themselves and doesn't talk to anyone, but friend requests them all, thinking they know all of the people back there, but in reality they are my friends that I have known and I only tell that person a tidbit of what happens. I don't have the heart to tell them leave, because I have known them for a while, but in that case I only ever see a few of them, Jr leaders- old and new- at fair week and no other time of the year. Fair time is special for me because of those people.

I love my friends, but there is a time that I see them; school, weekends, and some holidays. but fair week I kind of want them to leave me the check alone. now if I see you for an hour or two that's fine, but when I see you constantly where I like to be left alone, I don't.

I swear I don't want you to think I hate people, but haven't you ever felt like there was that one friend that you love, but when you have friends you haven't seen in a whole year don't you want to spend time with them and not the best friend, because they are not going to get some of the things you are doing or saying, and then you have to explain to them what is going on and then you get peeved with them, well I kind of had to do that this year. and they say they want to join, that is fine but if I see those friends again I might still feel the same way I did about this past fair week.

I want people included, I really do, but if you hang around us, I do act different not that I am ashamed, but different that friends don't really see that side of me. I am more outspoken, more confident, and maybe a little flirty. but not everyone knows that so that is why if I give a flirty look to a guy at the stand and he does it right back, it's because it was something that was hilarious at the time that we remember I don't want to have to explain it, because then you won't ever be able to make sense of it all, and I will be ticked that I had to explain it to you. if a guy keeps saying that one of the girls is loose and flexible, yes he is calling her easy, but it is a joke that we only understand.

I dress differently at fair than I do school, it is hot in that stand, so of course I am going to wear shorts, I don't want to be told that I need to cover up more by that friend. the way I think about my clothes is 'can I hug my grandma and grandpa and not have grandma scold me' that's how it is.