The Locked Note

Will

She loved me.

Her eyes sparkled every time our eyes mets.

She wrote about me once,
The next day,
she cried and ran away when her friends showed it to me,

She wanted it to be her little secret about me,
Of course I stayed still,
Turning to a blushing mess.

She used to walk me to my bus,
And she will always be offering her right hand while looking at her left side,
Our friends didn't stop teasing us about it.

Do she still remember the first day we met?
I know it wasn't about love,
but it was funny how she were the shy one back then.

Both of our seats were at the end of the class,
Of course we can't forget sharing chocolate bars in our classes.

In her birthday I drew Black
-from the "Grey is" manga-
in a big blue canvas for her,
She kept saying she want to take him with her everywhere.

She tried to draw for me,
Knowing how much it means to me.

Every time I act stupidly crazy,
She will laugh like it's her first time finding something funny.

She sang with her blessing angelic voice for me almost every night,
While I listened by the phone.

We texted almost every afternoon after school.

I can't forget any time she got very happy or excited,
Because every time she does,
I got a slap on my cheek from her own joy.

She upsets me once,
The same day,

Two young souls where hugging in the end of the class room.

She acts like she's four years older,
Although she's only four night older than me.

We both loved blue.

She loved watching football matches,
I watched some of her favorite team ones.

I love anime,
She watched my favorite long seasons.

She needed a holder,
And I needed a helper.

Between her multiple notes she wrote that every time she looked around,

she always found out at the very end that I'm the only one who stayed and waited for her.

I loved her.

I loved how we knew from each other's eyes that we're hungry and bored from our friends nonstop jokes,
How we will stand up at the same time and get out from the classroom heading to the canteen.

I do remember the day I fall for her,
We were in a school trip to an ice skating area,
She told me while she was laying her head on my shoulder that I should protect her,
Knowing how much I love ice skating,
Because it was her first time.

My heart fluttered the way that maybe,
maybe she heard it raced.

We adored each other,
and we still do.

Our time together?

You don't try to remember something you didn't actually forget, do you?

Some letters together actually can not talk about it,

Her ever little things were all my favorite.

We loved each other.

....But,

We knew that we couldn't be together in this world,

We knew our society can't accept us to be together,

We knew our parent won't let us be us,

We knew we can do nothing about it,

So she left first.

She knew I'll get hurt,
She knew I'll cry a lot,
She knew I'll miss her,
She knew I'll write it all,
She knew I'll sketch more,

But she still left,
For the good of my heart?

She didn't understood that at all,

She was my heart,
So don't ask me why I am heartless after her.

I got hurt,

............Deeply hurt.