Pete's POV
Patrick fell asleep about an hour ago and im still laying here beside him wide awake.
The sudden demand that came from him was unexpected but it surprisingly (not really) turned me on a bit. While he changed in my bedroom I used the bathroom downstairs to, well... deal with the problem he created with his demanding attitude. I could NOT risk him hearing me so i put a towel over my mouth to muffle any sound i might accidentally let out. When i returned to the bedroom he was already in bed, not asleep but on his phone. I walked over to the bed and just as i sat on the edge, his phone slipped from his hands and smacked him straight in the face. He did nothing for a few seconds, he only groaned until finally he reached up and grabbed it before tossing it angrily. He shifted his body so he was laying on his side and looked at me with a cute little pout on his face. I laid down and mirrored his actions, we remained this way for a while before i noticed his eyes getting heavy and finally shutting completely.
As i watched him sleep, (ITS NOT CREEPY) I began to think and remember some stuff from the past. Little things he said or did to me that i have not and will not forget.
flashback
"Patrick, if this is a birthday thing i swear to god im gonna be so mad at you."
"god pete why the fuck are you always so against doing something for your birthday? It's your fucking birthday for fuck's sake?!"
I looked down at my feet, that has been a question i could not answer for years. Well, not COULD not, WILL not. I have not had a birthday since i was 6, not by my choice of course, what kid doesn't want cake and presents and attention. I had a 6th suprise birthday party, by the time my 7th came along, i got nothing... not even a happy birthday. As the years passed i still held hope that my family would at least get me a cake and sing happy birthday to me but the hope faded completely when on my 13th birthday i got nothing, not even an adknowledgement that i was in the house. That was when i realized i was just a burden, i wanted too much and people got tired of giving it to me. Of course they would not want to spend their time and money on me, i had nothing to present, nothing to show that i deserved it.
Patrick knocked me back into reality with a punch in the arm.
"Were you even fucking listening to me Pete?!"
"You want to know why i wont celebrate?! FUCKING FINE! Why would i be so selfish, so greedy as to force people to celebrate me? ME! What the fuck am i? I should not be celebrated, I don't deserve it. What have I ever done? All i do is sleep and eat and shit and write shitty songs!" My voice got softer, almost a whisper, "I don't deserve anything except for someone to push me off the edge of a cliff. I'm just a waste of breath, i'd give my life to any of those terminally ill kids. i'm sure they could put it to better use."
The silence was heavy, i could feel Patrick's eyes burrowing into my skull. I heard a sniffle and I looked up just in time to see Patrick take my body in his arms. His embrace was tight, like if he let go i'd float away. I let him hug me for a while, assuming he just wanted to make me feel better. After a few minutes he pulled away and spoke to me in a stern but gentle voice.
"Pete, god I can't even comprehend how you could possibly fucking think like that. You are way good enough to celebrate, you do deserve it. At least a fucking cake Pete, christ... a cake wouldn't hurt. You are so much more than what you seem to think, AND YOUR SONGS ARE NOT SHITTY. You have an insane way with words that i haven't seen in anyone else. You're a very good looking, intellegent man. Anyone would be lucky as shit to have you. You have potential Pete, you can make your life fucking great if you try. And you know what? You will never have to go through anything alone. As long as im alive, ill be her by your side."
I didn't realize that i was crying until he reached up and wiped my tear. He laid his head on my shoulder and i heard him sing so softly i barely caught it.
"We can fake it for the airwaves
Force our smiles, baby, half dead
From comparing myself to everyone else around me"
I listened and enjoyed the sound of his voice. Then it hit me, those were my lyrics... my lyrics and Patrick's voice and it sounded great. And that there was the exact moment that i knew that i could have a good life, WE could have a good life.
end flashback
The sun was now shining bright through my curtains. Fuck, how long was i daydreaming?
I heard a soft voice singing from the bathroom and i listened carefully.
"Trying to forget everyhting that isn't you, i'm not going home alone cause i dont do too well on my own."
What is this man doing to me? What is his fucking voice doing to me?
(A/N: I got way carried away while writing this haha oops it is LOOOONG. But thats a good thing right? )
