Broken Promise | Monsta X Jooheon

23//History

"Minibars, expensive cars, hotel rooms, and new tattoos, good champagne, and private planes. But we don't need anything. 'Cause the truth is out. I realise that without you here, life is just a lie. This is not the end. This is not the end. We can make it, you know it, you know." — History, One Direction

Strangely enough, though Ajiad and I could be considered to have the most in common, she is simultaneously the one I'm most comfortable with and the most disturbed by.

Ok, maybe disturbed isn't particularly the right word, but she just kind of...I don't know how to describe.

As stupid of a phrase as it is, I'm right in saying that it's not her. It's nothing she's done, it's all me.

Some part of me looks at her and thinks, "Maybe if Mom had had a daughter like that, she'd still be here."

It's stupid and unfair.

I don't even know enough about Ajiad to make claims like that.

But still, it doesn't take more than a surface analysis to see she's got me outstripped in every single way.

She has more friends, can actually make social connections with people, is kind and compassionate. She doesn't hurt people in some stupid attempt to shut them out.

She actually has a healthy relationship with someone she trusts.

She's everything I hoped I would miraculously turn out to be and everything I ended up straying furthest from.

She's admittedly not at all who I expected I would end up being alone with — I honestly didn't think she and Hyungwon could even exist without being glued to each other's side — but I wasn't complaining, even though I was feeling a bit squeamish in the giant massage chair next to hers.

Still, I tried to relax as she, Changkyun, and I sat getting pedicures at the most expensive and high-end spa we could find on Google Maps.

It was understood that I was paying.

The sound of the faux waterfalls lining the stone walls and New Age music filtering clearly through the expensive speakers calmed as much of the tension in my body as it could as I sat, trying not to burst into laughter at the person continuously messing with my feet.

Changkyun was all the way on the other side of the room, brows furrowed and tongue peeking out in concentration at whatever video game he played on his PSP as he got his toenails painted black. Having come in earlier, he was already nearly finished and his feet looked as fucking gorgeous as feet could look.

Ajiad was trying not to laugh as I fidgeted and fussed, trying my best to stay in one place for the slightly-amused, slightly-annoyed technician doing my feet. Probably the only reason they hadn't told me off yet was because they could tell I was trying my best to remain as still and quiet as possible.

I couldn't help it.

Despite my demeanor, I was actually ticklish on my entire fucking body and just really sensitive to touch in general, but especially my feet.

"I never would have pegged you for someone so ticklish." she giggled.

I opened my mouth to respond, only to let out a loud guffaw when the technician touched the arch of my foot.

The sound startled everyone in the room, Changkyun having to pause his game to laugh at my tomato-red face where my hand had instinctively clasped around my mouth and my eyes were wide in horror.

Ajiad was laughing too — albeit not nearly as loud as Changkyun — and our nail technicians were trying to continue their jobs without snickering too much.