Broken Promise | Monsta X Jooheon

25//Teenager In Love

"You call me Queen. You're in ripped jeans. And you just pulled up to a love song. Hearts in my eyes. Strawberry skies. Beat up Corvettes, smelling of cigarettes. But time keeps on slipping. You make me feel like a teenager in love. And you make me feel like I'll be forever young. And I don't want no, nobody else." — Teenager In Love, Madison Beer

The library was completely silent except for the clacking of keyboards, the rushed scribbled of pen on paper, and the flutter of pages turning. Jooheon's chest was warm and sturdy against my back as I sat, cuddled very contently in his lap with his arms wound around me holding my Physics book upright as we both read, whispering occasionally to discuss bits of the text or which parts we need to highlight.

Jooheon was a year older but had been held back in eighth grade so we were both juniors and had a majority of the same classes. Kids with bad grades don't have a lot of class options.

I don't even really know how I ended up curled in his lap in the first place. When we got here two hours ago, we'd been sitting a respectable distance away from each other, across the table as a matter of fact. Then I moved beside him to ask about a concept in the chapter and next thing I knew my head was tucked under his chin and his jacket thrown around the both of us as a makeshift blanket, feeling more safe and sound than I had since Jiho left.

Fuck fancy items and expensive sofas, Jooheon's lap was as luxurious as luxury gets.

I jumped a bit as my phone vibrated, skittering across the table a bit with the force of the movement.

Since Jooheon's arms were already on the table to hold the book up, he grabbed it and handed it to me, trying to be sneaky in his nosiness as his eyes cut not-so-subtly across my shoulder, trying to see the text.

We both knew what it was.

My phone was on silent except for the text notifications I got when a new grade had been entered in the grade book.

I tried to calm my now-speeding heartbeat as I opened my messages, my whole operating system seeming to run slower than usual though I knew it was just my anxiety making it seem this way.

I'd just taken two tests recently, a makeup for Algebra II and a current one for Physics, both my worst subjects. Studying for both of them had ran me ragged and I was so jittery throughout them that I was sure I'd failed both.

I don't know if I'd be able to take seeing a failing grade right in my face right now.

"So what's the verdict?" Jooheon asked, sounding almost as anxious as I felt.

I turned to him beaming, practically shoving the phone up his nose as I whisper-yelled "Ninety-one and ninety-five!"

Jooheon broke out into an equivalent smile, dropping the textbook and winding his arms back around me, this time in a warm, tight hug. "That's amazing, Promise, you're so fucking smart, I knew you could do-"

Jooheon's voice cut off, eyes widening as my mouth connected to his.

I'd kissed him before, plenty of times obviously, but this was different. Nothing like our lust or anger filled kisses we'd share before having sex to forget one trauma or another.

This was different.

It was soft, barely there. Like this kiss you shared when you had a major crush on someone and they scrambled your brain so much that you could barely think straight and didn't know what the hell you were doing.

It was a few milliseconds where nothing happened, I was about to pull away and run out, but then he responded, eyes closing with mine and fuck, it was a kiss so sweet and pure and full of emotion rather than lust. I'd never experienced anything like it. I wanted it more, I wanted it all the time.

I didn't want it with anyone else, just him.

I'd always been so scared of feeling anything for Jooheon other than lust but now, fuck that, this feels amazing. I want all the emotion he could throw at me.

Maybe I'm still a little scared, but I'm infinitely more scared of ever letting him go.