No Thanks

Chapter Two

I sit in my room and stare at the wall. My knife is in my hands, but I'm gliding it across my left wrist. My right wrist has way too many scars, so I use my left wrist and forearm.

I stop and start to clean the wounds. After that, I out my armour on. I run to the training room and start to train.

Why do people keep interrupting my training? I look over and Shiro standing in the doorway. He is smiling innocently.

"Activate training level number three" I say and the bot comes.

"Ending training sequence" Shiro shouts.

"What the heck! Shiro" I scream at him.

"We're trying to form Voltron. We need you in order to do that" he explains.

"How long did it take you to realize I wasn't there" I ask.

"Lance pointed it out as we were flying out of the castle. I said you would turn up shortly, but you didn't. Allura announced it over the castle" he answers.

"I was training, sorry" I run to my lion and fly out. We practice for a while and do terribly.

"We need to bond. Everyone tell us a fear. That is good bonding" Shiro orders.

"I'm scared of the dark" Hunk tells us.

"I'm scared of never finding my family" Pidge says.

"I'm scared of not being a good leader" Shiro informs.

"I'm scared of never going back to Earth" Lance sighs. I stay quiet. I can't tell them my fears!

"Keith, you can do this" Shiro encourages.

"You sure you want to know" I ask.

"Yes" they all answer.

"I'm scared of telling people about me because I don't want people to hate me as much as I hate myself" I mutter the last part.

"Keith" Shiro starts but doesn't keep going.

"It doesn't matter Shiro! Let's just form Voltron. You can lecture me later" I growl and Voltron is formed.

"Good job! Now go to the dining hall and we will eat as a team" the last word from Allura"s mouth was directed towards me.

"Right" I sigh and follow behind everyone. The walls feel like they're closing in. I just told my team my greatest fear.

"Keith, are you gonna sit down? Or are you just gonna glare at the floor from the corner" Lance asks, a smirk appearing on his face.

"I'm fine over here" I say and keep thinking.

They don't like me. They will never like me. Maybe it's because I don't trust them. Maybe it's because I can never be good enough. Either way, they hate me.

"Keith" my thoughts were interrupted by Shiro's voice. I look up and see everyone left.

"Huh? Yeah" I ask.

"Everyone left like ten minutes ago. Why are you still in here" Shiro asks.

"I uh wae just thinking" I say. I begin to walk away but Shiro grabs my arm and pulls me back.

He examines my face. His eyes hold worry, as he brings his hand in to touch me. His fingers trail across my face.

"What have you been doing to yourself" he sighs. A Faso ckmes from his mouth. Did he think of something?

"What" I ask. He shakes his head and backs away from me.

"You wouldn't c- cut right" he questions, his voice tremulous. Of course I would!

"No, that is a symbol for the week" I lie. He nods and grabs my arm. Lance's obsession with make up has just saved my life.

He pulls my sleeve up and sees a clean arm. An audible sigh falls from his mouth. He rolls my sleeve back down and hugs me.

It has been forever since I hugged Shiro. Tears form in my eyes and I hug him tightly. Words of comfort string between his lips.

"You left! I waited for you to come back, bit you didn't. You promised me that you would come back! Nkw that you're here, I feel like you've never been further away. Shiro, what is wring with me? Why does the entire team hate me? Even you have turned your back on me! I just want to know why I'm not good enough" I sob.

"Shhhh, Keith you are wonderful. You are the best team mate we have. You are ambitious and put everyone before you. How much you care for these people is unsafe. I know I promised to come back, and I'm sorry that I've been distant. You are loved by everyone on the team, we are just cautious around you. You always look so broken" Shiro explains.

He takes me to my room. While we're walking, I trip. A chuckle emits from Shiro. I glare at him and attempt to stand up.

"Shiro" I glare at the ground because my knees have given out. He picks me up and carries me bridal style.

"Keith, you're really light" Shiro states.

"I know, it's a... Healthy weight" I say, bit it sounded more like a question.

"Well, here is your stop. Sleep well, ok" he gives me a stern look.

"Could you, maybe, stay with me" I ask, looking at the ground.

"Of course! I mean um sure" he follows me into my room and waits for me to change.

I walk out and he blushes. Why is he blushing? I ignore him and lay down on my bed. He keeps staring at me.

"Um... Why are you starting at me" I question.

"You look adorable" he exclaims.

"Aw thanks, now come lay down with me so I don't have nightmares" I command.

"Ah, so that's why you wanted me to stay" he teases.

"Shut up" I blush and look away.

"You are the most kawaii person I know" Shiro fangirls.

"That is the gayist thing you have ever said" I laugh.

"Shut up, we are both gay" Shiro looks away.

"True true" I giggle and lay my head on Shiro's chest, fiddling with his robot arm.

"Did it hurt" I ask suddenly. I look up at him and he nods.

"I remember unbearable pain. That is the most I remember, nothing more" he explains.

"While you were gone, I messed up. I did something that would make you really mad at me" I say and yawn.

"What did you do" he asks. Another yawn escapes my lips.

"I dropped out of the Garrison so I could find you. I went back to the desert and began to I serve the star patterns. I marked charts and had a whole board as to where you might be. I found you in an on coming ship. I broke in and got you. Then you know the rest" I say.

"It's ok" he states. I yawn and close my eyes. Shiro's warmth leads me to sleeping fine.