Gaystripe's Guide to Sexualities!

Part Seven - Aromantic

The audience is just sitting there, waiting for Gaystripe to come up on the stage. There hasn't been any movement whatsoever since the seats had filled up. Some cats are now checking Wattpad for new notifications if Gaystripe will be back. Others are sleeping. Suddenly, Gaystripe comes tumbling out from backstage and in the spotlight.

Gaystripe: Again? I thought you all would've left by now.

The audience roars boos at him, causally throwing tomatoes at him for making them wait for so long.

Gaystripe: H-Hey! Watch it! I decided not to wear the chunky suit of armor ONCE and this is what I get!?!

A random cat from the audience throws a tomato and it splatters against his head.

Gaystripe: I feel the love. Hey, that's kinda ironic, since the topic we're discussing today is a romantic orientation.

The audience glances at each other in confusion.

Gaystripe: Today's orientation is Aromantic

The audience begins to loudly chant. Suddenly, the spotlight crashes down, nearly crushing Gaystripe along with the audience. All of the lights turn off, and now everycat is panicking.

Gaystripe: What is WITH you guys!?! Anyways, while the crew works on fixing the lights... *quickly grabs phone and whispers into it* you guys are working on fixing the lights, right?

The audience starts to chatter about when the lights will go on.

Gaystripe: Whatever. They always say it's better when you can't see anything.

*Lights turn on*

Gaystripe: There we go! Now, anyways, let's start off. Aromantic is a kind of romantic orientation. In contrast to asexuals, aromantics don't feel romantic attraction.

Puzzled muttering again begins to rise up in the crowd. A cat raises their paw to ask a question.

Gaystripe: Before I go answering questions, it doesn't mean that aromantics are heartless and will never experience love in any sort of way. We all have friends and family, right?

A cat from the audience raises his paw.

Gaystripe: What?

Random Cat: But you don't have any friends. Straightfur doesn't even acknowledge your existence.

Audience let's out a big burn moment on poor Gaystripe.

Gaystripe: No harassment! He's just busy! Aromantic cats are happy and content with platonic relationships, so it isn't like they're sad or depressed. They're happy too!

The audience dies down, now slowly tuning into what he has to say about the questioning subject.

Gaystripe: Aromantics can also be asexual. Aromantics who are also asexual are called "Asexual Aromantics", or "Ace-Aros".

The audience nods in understanding now. Murmuring spreads through the crowd like wildfire about the new discovery.

Gaystripe: Now, the word aromantic comes from the prefix, 'a', which means, 'not'. And, if you remove the a from aromantic, you get romantic.

Audience gasps at his wonderful mind-blowing trick.

Gaystripe: As you see, when you add the 'a' onto romantic, you will get aromantic. So as you see, aromantic means 'not romantic'.

The audience slowly begins to cheer for his success at his teaching career.

Gaystripe: Now it's time for the wonderful flag that represents that aromantics out there!

Audience leans closer to examine the colorful flag.

Gaystripe: For a long time, there wasn't a flag for aromantics. There is still come confusion over it, but for now, this is what we've got! The two green stripes represent the aromantic spectrum, including demi-aromantic and grey-aromantic, as well as others.

They crowd nods in understanding as well, eager to learn more.

Gaystripe: The yellow stripe represents platonic relationships, and the importance and validity of them.

The audience quiets down, whispering with themselves about their own platonic relationships.

Gaystripe: The grey and black stripes represent the range of sexual orientations of aromantics, since aromantics can be any of the sexual orientations as well.

The crowd begins to protest that the lecture is about romantic orientations, not sexual ones.

Gaystripe: Watch it! Fine! I'll stop! Anyways, aromantics are normal cats. In fact, Straightfur's best friend, Arosparrow -

Audience begins to snicker at Gaystripe.

Gaystripe: Ssshhh!!!! Anyways, Arosparrow is a pretty cool cat, and a great friend to Straightfur. He's not heartless in any way, he just isn't romantically attracted to anyone.

A cat in the audience raises her paw, and Gaystripe reluctantly motions for her to speak.

Random Cat: So, just to clarify, you think that Arosparrow is a "cool cat" because he won't compete with you for Straightfur's eternal love?

The cats begin to nod at each other, smirking knowingly.

Gaystripe: No, that's not it! Arosparrow is a great and loyal friend to -

Gaystripe narrows his eyes, having realized that the cats are just mocking him now. As he begins to grow angrier, a few of the cats begin to load paint into a machine in the back of the room.

Gaystripe: You think you're funny? W-well I'll tell you, you're not! Mocking me is not going to make you any f-funnier!

He clears his throat, and resumes his lecture.

Gaystripe: Anyways. Aromantics can have the platonic version of a crush, called a "squish". They can also be in relationships. When an aromantic is in a relationship that is more than friends, but less than romantic, it is called a "queerplatonic relationship".

The cats turn on the machine, and before Gaystripe can move, paint starts to fly out towards him.

Gaystripe: *shrieks* WHAT'S WITH THE PAINT!?!?!

Paint splatters against his fur, knocking him to the ground as the rest of the audience begins to laugh at his failure. More paint keeps firing at him, not giving Gaystripe the chance to get up.

Gaystripe: STOP IT ALREADY!!! WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO NOW!?! BAN PAINT, TOMATOES, AND EGGS!?!

Written by Mack

Edited by Solstice